Fall Season Reviews

Okay, to rev up for reviewing horror movies for october, I'm going to review the shows in the new fall season! Yay!

I am way too excited about this. I think it's the drugs.

I tried to watch Playboy Club, or whatever it's called, last night. That's monday nights. 10 pm, Channel, 2, I think? Amber Heard is in it. There's some other girls, too. But really, for me, it's all about Amber Heard.

The plot of this has something to do with chicago, at one of those playboy clubs, back in the 60's, maybe? Could have been the 70's or 80's, but i doubt it. If you don't know about these, you were born after 1990. Playboy clubs were all the rage back in the old days, when Playboy magazine was the first time you saw a naked woman, and the internet wasn't even thought of back then. If you had the money or the know-who, you could drink and chat up ladies who were either featured in Playboy, or wanted to be, or who just looked hot enough to serve you drinks. There was probably some prostitution going on, too, but what the hell do I know, I was never there. I was barely even born by then.

To be honest, I couldn't watch the series pilot. There was a moment there where Amber Heard was looking over some female singer and thinking dirty hot steamy lesbian thoughts, because the actress herself recently "came out" as it were, and then the moment passed and I couldn't watch it anymore. I'm not really sure why. Honestly, you'd think Amber Heard, who reminds me of a younger Scarlett Johannson, with the same sultry voice, in a playboy bunny outfit would be every man's dream, but I just can't stand period pieces. This series should have been done back when playboy clubs were popular, and maybe it would have been a big hit, but I can't see it lasting more than a few episodes. Knowing my reviewing skills, it'll probably be the most popular show this year.

Tonight I saw New Girl, with Zooey Deschaniel. Tuesdays.. 9 pm maybe? Zooey's a cutie, but i don't think this series is going anywhere. There were a few funny moments, but there was a lot of filler material in between. Essentially, it's about a girl who is cheated on by her boyfriend, dumps him, and moves in with three guys to try and make herself feel better. Supposedly, she got tired of living with her model friend, which makes no sense, really, but whatever. So she's bawling and these three ... ok, three douchebags are trying to help her feel better, and honestly, i don't know how this show got greenlit. If Zooey's cuteness doesn't sell it, it's going straight down the tubes. I give it one season.

Also, I managed to catch the last half hour of Sarah Michelle Gellar's new show, Ringer! I have no idea what the premise of this show is about, but I don't really care. There was some party, and supposedly there's a body hidden in this antique chest, and Sarah knows about it and no one else does except there's some detective shadowing her... eh. Who cares. Oh how nice, a flashback to explain things, ok, Ringer, I get it now, she's a twin. So Sarah is playing not only twins, but the older, responsible twin, because apparently, her twin died. Oh that explains it, her twin died, and she's stepped into her twin's shoes to find out how and why. Oh, and here's something new, her twin's not actually dead. Of course, then they couldn't call it Ringer. This show... I don't know. It seems like they spent money on it, it's probably all sarah's money and she's trying hard to sell it. I'll give it... two seasons, held aloft by rabid Buffy fans who don't know when to move on.

I also tried to watch Unforgettable, something about a detective who runs into an old boyfriend... I've already forgotten this show. The detective is uninteresting, and the show bounces from one scene to the next way too fast to let you know what's going on. In one moment, she's got a gun pulled on a poker player, the next, she's dumping the gun in a dumpster. No clue as to what happened. Maybe they'll explain it later, maybe they won't, I'm not sticking around to find out. Cancelled within a few episodes, easy.

From the sound of it, it must appear that I have a short attention span, but honestly, I think of it as the exact opposite, a long attention span. If the show doesn't spend enough time explaining what's going on, developing characters, and moving along the plot, it doesn't sustain my interest. A sure bet to make me switch the channel is a show that's going only for laughs, bouncing around from scene to scene, popping off action for no apparent reason just to get viewers.. I see right through it.

Which is why I'm now watching Body of Proof again, a returning show from last season. All the actors know their stuff, all the characters seem well developed, and they take plenty of time to detail what's going on, who did it, and why. It's a CSI type of show, with Dana Delany, and that hot chick who played seven of nine on Star Trek Voyager. I'm sure she's a good enough actress that I should remember more than how hot she is, like her name, but as anyone who knows me can tell you, I'm not good with names. But anyway, it's eminently more watchable that anything else that was on tonight.

That's all for tonight. I know there's supposed to be some monstery, witcfhcraftery shows on this season, and I am looking forward to the return of the walking dead, and dexter, but I have to wait for october for those! I'll keep you updated if i find anything interesting to watch on TV.. makes me wonder why I bother paying for cable, honestly.