Thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster, it's Spring!

Well goddamn, I made it through another winter! Holy shit!

It's now April here, and while on tuesday we had snow, by friday we are supposed to have temperatures near 70. Ah, weather, I yearn to find out why you enjoy afflicting us with head colds by doing this rapid temperature change shit in the fall and then hit us with allergies every spring. Mother Nature is apparently a cruel and fickle bitch.

Just kidding, Mother Nature! Honest. And I apologize because at one point a few years back, we had a huge storm predicted for our area, and being the storm-lover that I am, I was eagerly awaiting the thunder and lightning show, because, hey, fourth of july only comes once a year, but storms can occur year round! So there I was, sitting in my room, happily playing some random game (it's what I do, it's all i do, I am... The Gaminator!), and I hear this tiny little rumble of thunder, and then... nothing. Not being the first time I have been sorely disappointed by the weatherman's pronouncements of impending doom only to be greeted by a minor sprinkle, I angrily said, to the open window, in one of my more loony moments "Is that all you got, Mother Nature!?" I may have been partially drunk. To which Mother Nature responded immediately with the loudest and longest burst of thunder I have ever heard in my life. I may have wet myself. And them proceeded to follow it with 4 goddamn HOURS of near-constant lightning and thunder. So, I no longer try to piss off Mother Nature, on the odd chance that I am actually successful and she sends a tornado into my bedroom whilst I sleep.

Women can be pretty vengeful at times.

Well, I'm 41 now. Yep. Had a decently fun birthday yesterday, or at least, nothing overtly bad happened, which is a good day lately, and I spent it eating food that was bad for me and ... well, playing PC games. I had a chance to watch The Wolfman again, but I've seen it several times already so I just went back to Minecraft.

At work yesterday, and yes, I did work yesterday, I went through the annual round of "You're what, 80 now?" and "Happy birthday old man!" Yes, well, in the tech field, one deals with that sort of nonsense from the newborns they hire who think they know something because they were able to successfully use the blink tag in html on their grammar school web page. All my managers (and there are many) are younger than I am, and for two glorious weeks some years back, I was proud to be the oldest person in the call center. Yes! Go, me! And then they hired some 50+ year old woman, who, let it be noted, I got along with well, who had a rich sense of humor, and moved on to greener pastures. And by that, I mean she got another job, not that she died. In the interim, they hired other older folks, so I am still not the oldest person here. But I bet I will outlast them all! MUA HA HA HA HAAAAA!!!

I'm not really sure what it is about young people that makes them think all old folks have nothing important to say. I do, of course, remember feeling the same way when i was younger. However, I still feel that people older than me are semi-retarded for the most part. Come to think of it, I feel that many of the young people nowadays are completely retarded, so maybe I am just an egotistical prick who thinks too much of his genius level IQ. It's possible. I did turn down membership in MENSA. Twice.

Frankly, I am happy to have lived as long as I have. Sure, that makes me sound like an old man, but I greet each day with wondrous humor and usually awaken with morning wood and sometimes a hangover, so I got to be doing something right, it seems like. Plus, I get lots of free time, usually have a decent amount of pocket money, and I can buy whatever I want. I mean seriously, what more can you ask out of life other than fun, good friends and internet access to porn?

Keep enjoying my blogs, brando, old buddy, and I'll keep being literally insane so you have something to giggle at. I still think daylight savings time has to go, and I've been to arizona. Too many old people. And so dry there. SO DRY! I went as a kid and it was 115 degrees out and I was bike racing with my cousins (this was years back), and it didn't even feel hot out. There's just something wrong with a place that can be 115 degrees in the burning sun and not feel hot, I think. It's like hell, only with more old people. Smells funny, too, but that could just have been my aunt. She's like 150 or something.