Surprise, surprise, surprise!

I was pleasantly surprised this weekend!

No, I did not lose 3 pounds nor gain a quarter inch penis size due to excessive viagra usage. I decided to stay in saturday night, instead of going out and partying with 3 women at once, mainly because, you know, I wasn't actually invited out to any parties saturday night and if I started hanging out with three random women at a random party, I'd probably have gotten pepper sprayed, kicked in the gonads, and arrested, but my main reason was I wanted to watch some cool movies. And, while getting kicked, tasered and arrested could qualify as a fun evening, I really wasn't in the mood for foreplay that evening.

Instead, I tried to watch the Invention of lying, with um, whatsisname.... I forget. That british guy. Wrote for the office or something. Bleh. Anyway, I found the whole premise ridiculous, but tried to give it the benefit of the doubt for at least the first hour. Mainly because, nothing else good was on TV til the second hour. But yea, I actually switched to watch a poorly made sci fi movie instead of the invention of lying, mainly because it sucked balls. And yes, the poorly made sci fi movie was more entertaining. Oh, sorry, not sci fi anymore, it's now SYFY. Damn arseholes.

Then Jennifer's Body came on another channel. I was not expecting to enjoy this movie. I saw Megan Fox in Transformers and Transformers 2, and like most males of adolescent mindset (despite me being 40 years old), I've been reading news articles about the, erm, zany things she says when she doesn't have a script, and I've pretty much concluded that she was a drug-addled, brain-dead bimbo. Nothing against Megan Fox, I mean, pretty much all of Hollywood consists of drug-addled, brain-dead bimbos, and that includes the male actors as well. I mean, look at Mel Gibosn. Erm. Anyway. My point being, despite the whole demon-possession thing, the most i expected to see was a little nudity. Which, given that it's Megan Fox and her body is really her only asset, I wouldn't mind sitting through an ok movie to see her naked. I know. I need to get out more.

However, I was ridiculously blown away by this movie. I'm not saying it could go toe to toe with Aliens or anything, but the first thing I noticed is, it was a love story about two teen girls in love. Sure, one was a bitchy Megan Fox and the other was a mousy, subservient little blond, and they were from totally different social circles, but I was still surprised at the relationship there. And then all hell broke loose. Literally.

So megan takes her mousy lil blond love slave out to a bar, and megan is busy flirting with the band while the blond is all like no, this is bad, we should go, and megan tells her to woman up or whatever. And then the bar burns down. In the confusion, the band's lead singer slips megan a drink, probably laced with roofies, and takes her into the band's van. Now here I am thinking, ooh gang bang on megan fox, and I don't know why I was thinking that because the band is so emo they couldn't possibly be straight. I mean... it's an ALL-BOY BAND. Duh. So instead of a gangbang, they sacrifice megan to demons in return for fame and fortune. Now, unfortunately, Megan is, as we all know, NOT a virgin, which, as anyone who has ever sacrificed a non-virgin to the dark gods can tell you, is a BAD THING. I can't even begin to list the number of movies this happens in, but apparently, these emo boy bands are too busy dry humping each other in the back of a van to watch movies, so of course they have no idea. Suffice it to say, a demon is called, but things go badly, and Megan ends up being a demon. Which makes for the title of Jennifer's body.

Anyway, my time is short at the moment so I'll sum up, this movie starts a little slow but turns out pretty freakin good. I mean, had they not used megan fox, I think this film would have done MUCH better at the theaters and been acclaimed as an excellent horror movie. I have heard that people got the impression that the film was trying too hard to become a cult classic, but I don't really see how that could be. How do you "intend" a film to become a cult classic? That's like saying they intended a movie to do horribly at the box office but make some poor smattering of money from DVD sales. The only thing that ever once threw me out of the movie instead of being enraptured by it, was the appearance of lance henrikson, who of course, was in Aliens. Maybe that's why they thought it was trying to be a cult classic? i don't know. In any case, I would seriously vote this movie into cult classic fame and have reconsidered my below average opinion of megan fox because of it. Seriously, it's good enough to wipe her mediocre performance in transformers entirely from my mind.

Also, I saw 2012 with John Cusack. I heard that movie was bad as well. I think I need to stop listening to reviews because they are often wrong, because I thought 2012 was decent. I mean, I wouldn't watch it again, unlike jennifer's body, but it wasn't bad the first time.

Time to go home, but one final note, I am pretty sure Jennifer's body did not actually contain any nudity, much to my dismay. :-(