Not many good things came out of the 1990's. Come to think of it, I can't think of a one. Give me a minute. Oh, there was... No. Hmmmm. No. Oh, how about... Nope. No, I got nothin. Nothing except the greatest Zombie Love Story Ever Told. And, yes, that includes Warm Bodies.
Return of the Living Dead 3 (1993) is just that. The Greatest Zombie Love Story Ever Told. But let me sum up. Curt Reynolds is the teenage son of Colonel Reynolds, a military research scientist involved in the experimentation and containment of 2-4-5 Trioxin. Any of you who have seen the cult classic Return of the Living Dead (1985) or any of the sequels, know that 2-4-5 Trioxin is the stuff that the military was looking for in the first moxie. Trioxin (for short) is the gas that, quite simply, reanimates the dead. Colonel Reynolds is in the midst of an experiment in controlling the reanimated dead when his son Curt and his girlfriend Julie sneak in and find out about the effects of Trioxin on the bodies of the deceased. Unfortunately, the experiment goes horribly wrong, and ... yea. All hell breaks loose.
Let's start with what I love about this movie. Melinda Clarke's boobs. Yea, I said it. It's out there. Curt's girlfriend Julie (Melinda Clarke) is what we probably think of as a 'Cutter' now. Basically confusing pain with pleasure, Julie spends her spare time hurting herself, when she's not getting half-naked with Curt. To say Julie is a little unbalanced is probably understating things, but this is usually the type of girl who I meet in bars and hit it off with, so who am I to judge? Everyone's special in their own way, and actresses who aren't afraid to get naked in horror movies are a very special breed.
So, minor spoiler, when Julie has a little accident while riding on the back of Curt's bike, is it any surprise that the ever-devoted Curt uses Trioxin gas to bring her back to life? No, it really isn't, so that's probably not even much of a spoiler is it? Shit, if she were my girlfriend, I'd have brought her back to life, too. What is a surprise, is how hard Julie works to stop herself from eating Curt's brains. From hurting herself worse than she ever did in life, to denying her own unceasing hunger for brains, Julie repeatedly stops herself from eating Curt. And for a brain-hungry zombie, that's nothing short of miraculous.
Is it any wonder that I call this the Greatest Zombie Love Story Ever Told? No. No it isn't. Sure, Warm Bodies (2013) came a close second, but I chose Warm Bodies second for several reasons. One, it's not really a Zombie love story. The male lead in Warm Bodies eventually becomes alive again, so technically, he's not a Zombie. Nor is his girlfriend (Teresa Palmer) a zombie, though she is incredibly hot. Teresa's IMDB.com page says she's often mistaken for Kristin Stewart, which I just don't get. Kristen Stewart is kind of nice looking in a girl-next-door way, whereas Teresa is hot in a Jesus-Christ-I-think-I-just-orgasmed-in-my-jeans way. Sure, Melinda Clarke may not be as out-and-out pretty as Teresa Palmer, but she makes up for it with undead sensuality. So Warm Bodies really isn't a Zombie love story, but essentially a romance movie that happens to start post-mortem for one of the two involved. In Return of the Living Dead 3, I'm pretty sure Curt starts becoming a zombie the minute he turns Julie into one, due to over-exposure to Trioxin. Also, given such close contact with Julie, I'm almost absolutely certain he would've infected himself in other ways as well.
Now here's one thing that confuses me in Return of the Living Dead 3. Shooting a zombie in the head is always a universal cure for ending their undeath. Come to think of it, that's pretty much a universal cure for anything. Yet, here's Curt and Julie, escaping in a van, and the shopkeeper that's riding in the back of their van is accidentally shot in the head by the police. Then Julie, feeling a little peckish by this point, feeds on the corpse of the shopkeeper. Here's where things get confusing. Despite not being exposed to Trioxin at all, and not having much of a brain left, the shopkeeper is brought back to life by Julie's munching on his brain matter. How, exactly? His brains, pretty much splattered out of his head, are the only thing Julie munched on. If Trioxin (or the Z-virus, or whatever) is transferred by bite, which I think is also pretty much a standard tenet of all zombie flicks, then wouldn't it need a working brain to go ahead and revive the dead tissue? Sure, this series has reanimated limbs and such, but weren't those limbs reanimated by direct exposure to Trioxin gas? Well, despite the confusion involved in the reanimation of the shopkeeper, I'm pretty sure the rest of the movie is all good.
To sum up, decent acting for the 90's, though most of the cast is kind of unknown. I loved Sarah Douglas in the role of bossy Colonel Sinclair, sent to clean up Colonel Reynold's mess and using the opportunity to put forth her own agenda. Don't mistake the relative anonymity of the cast for a lack of acting skill, because the supporting actors are all veterans of numerous films. Even Melinda Clarke went on to appear in a number of other TV series and movies, though nothing as remotely popular as Return of the Living Dead 3 (which admittedly, isn't that popular). This movie is on Crackle.com if you want to watch it. I've seen it several times, and it hasn't lost any thrill for me over the years.
Bonus Review of Ominous (2015), which was on Syfy tonight. Ominous is a tale of a bereaved pair of parents who agree to have their son revived from the dead by a mysterious stranger (played by Mark Lindsay Chapman, the only actor I recognize), only to find that their son isn't quite the same as he was when he was alive. Ominous is your standard anti-christ tale, only so dumbed down with mediocre special effects and bad acting by most of the unknown cast, that it plays like a bad lifetime movie of the week. I don't know who made it, but if Asylum was responsible (the ones who make most of syfy's flicks), then this is one of their worst efforts yet. I don't recommend watching it the first time, let alone watching it again. There's nothing new here, and nothing even remotely interesting. Ultimately forgettable.
That's all for tonight! Catch you guys next time.
Saturday, October 10, 2015
Friday, October 9, 2015
Horror Review #8 and #9: Insidious part 1(2010) and 2 (2013)
If Zombies are the meat and potatoes of the horror genre, then creepy demonic possession flicks are the horror equivalent of eating pufferfish, in that it's a rare delicacy, and it can kill you if it's not prepared properly. Well, not really. I mean, eating badly-cooked pufferfish (otherwise known as fugu, I believe) can kill you, but people don't usually die of watching demonic possession movies. If they did, that would be both very bad, and the mark of an awesome horror movie, at the same time. Sure, Zombies are great horror movie fodder. Sure, you get your occasional frankenstein's monster, your werewolf, your dracula, but nothing scares the bejeesus out of the american public like a good demonic possession story. Think of The Exorcist, and how 42 years after its release, it's still the scariest movie of all time.
Insidious (2010) is another story about possession. I won't give away the plot, because it's difficult to do an intro to this movie without giving anything away, but let me paraphrase Elise (the psychic) when she explains a bit about the Further. The Further is a world beyond time where the dead gather, before moving on to other places. The Further is not meant for the living. It is filled with the deceased, the lost souls who wander eternally, and with other spirits. Spirits with a more insidious agenda, parasites, those who prey on the living... and worse.
Josh Lambert, the dad, is played by Patrick Wilson, of the Conjuring, and the upcoming Fargo series. Rose Byrne (of X-men, Neighbors, and 28 Weeks Later) plays his wife, and Elise the psychic is played by Lin Shaye, who may be more familiar to people who've seen Big Ass Spiders and Snakes on a Plane. I admit to not being overly familiar with Ms. Shaye's work, but a quick overview of her career from IMDB.com tells me she was in Brainsmasher, A Love Story (quite possibly Andrew Dice Clay's best work, and yes, I am serious), Critters 1 and 2, the Hidden, and the original Nightmare on Elm Street. Barbara Hershey plays Josh's mom, who I recall from The Entity, a pretty creepy horror flick from the early 80's. All the acting is pretty decent. Most of the special effects are okay, if a bit on the low-budget side, resulting in a few of the more common 'jump scares' and contributing a little towards the overall atmosphere.
I admit to being a little creeped out by Insidious, in an odd way. First off, I watched Insidious part 2 first, which is basically a continuation of the first movie. Yes, this is a two-part movie. The first part makes sense, but the second part continues the story and explains everything in the first movie in more detail. Insidious part 2 was on Netflix until last night, and never having seen the first or second movie, I didn't know they really needed to be viewed in order. Since Netflix was dropping Insidious 2 last night, I watched it first. I didn't have access to Insidious at the time, but I have since watched it on Crackle.com (and just noticed it's playing on Syfy channel right now). I don't know where you can watch Insidious 2 right now, but Insidious is still on crackle.com, and I think it's probably the better movie of the two movies, despite the second one basically being a continuation of the first movie, and starring all the cast members from the first one.
So, I'm watching Insidious 2, and I notice, hey, this is a decent horror flick. When I'm about halfway through, my nephew's daughter calls me to say hi. Since I haven't really talked to her in ages, I was a bit surprised. So I'm talking to her and there's a lot of static on the line because of the crappy portable phone. My nephew's daughter sounds just like she used to, which surprises me, because she's a teenager now, and should probably have sounded different than when she was 10 or 11, the last time I remember talking to her. So, we're talking and she asks me what I am watching, and I tell her Insidious part 2, not expecting her to have any idea what that was (especially considering that before last night, I had never even seen the movie). Being a bit of a horror movie fanatic, I'm used to normal people having no idea about the titles of the horror movies I am watching. So she asks me if I have seen the first one yet, or the third one. I confess I didn't even know there was a third one before she mentioned it, and while we're talking the static on the line clears up and she sounds completely different, more like a teenager would sound, and a lot less like my great-niece (or whatever you'd call my nephew's daughter). So she tells me I should probably watch them in order, in the voice of a stranger (since I haven't talked to her in ages), and honestly, this is not the type of girl I would ever have expected to know anything about horror movies. So, yes, after watching a creepy movie and getting a call from my long-lost great-niece, I admit to being a little weirded out by her extensive knowledge of scary movies. If this was an actual horror movie, I'd probably find out in a day or two that my great-niece has actually passed away, and that she died before I spoke to her on the phone. If she has, then I'm going to be REALLY creeped out. :-/ So, sure, all completely normal events, but I guess Insidious sort of got under my skin a bit. It is that kind of movie. As for my great-niece, I'm sure she's fine, and look forward to watching horror-movie marathons with her someday.
So, to sum up. Insidious 1 and 2, pretty decent horror movies. Insidious 3 out now, because they're flashing DVD and Blu-Ray ads for for Insidious 3 all through Insidious on SyFy. Insidious is on crackle.com, and good luck on finding Insidious 2. Also, I'm a bit of a scaredy-cat. Which, is actually a good thing. If scary movies didn't actually scare me sometimes, I probably wouldn't be watching them, right? Right. Don't worry, I usually still sleep like a baby at night, thanks for your concern. ;-)
That's all for tonight. Got some movies lined up for the weekend, so we should be all good for a few days. Enjoy the three day weekend, if you have monday off.
Insidious (2010) is another story about possession. I won't give away the plot, because it's difficult to do an intro to this movie without giving anything away, but let me paraphrase Elise (the psychic) when she explains a bit about the Further. The Further is a world beyond time where the dead gather, before moving on to other places. The Further is not meant for the living. It is filled with the deceased, the lost souls who wander eternally, and with other spirits. Spirits with a more insidious agenda, parasites, those who prey on the living... and worse.
Josh Lambert, the dad, is played by Patrick Wilson, of the Conjuring, and the upcoming Fargo series. Rose Byrne (of X-men, Neighbors, and 28 Weeks Later) plays his wife, and Elise the psychic is played by Lin Shaye, who may be more familiar to people who've seen Big Ass Spiders and Snakes on a Plane. I admit to not being overly familiar with Ms. Shaye's work, but a quick overview of her career from IMDB.com tells me she was in Brainsmasher, A Love Story (quite possibly Andrew Dice Clay's best work, and yes, I am serious), Critters 1 and 2, the Hidden, and the original Nightmare on Elm Street. Barbara Hershey plays Josh's mom, who I recall from The Entity, a pretty creepy horror flick from the early 80's. All the acting is pretty decent. Most of the special effects are okay, if a bit on the low-budget side, resulting in a few of the more common 'jump scares' and contributing a little towards the overall atmosphere.
I admit to being a little creeped out by Insidious, in an odd way. First off, I watched Insidious part 2 first, which is basically a continuation of the first movie. Yes, this is a two-part movie. The first part makes sense, but the second part continues the story and explains everything in the first movie in more detail. Insidious part 2 was on Netflix until last night, and never having seen the first or second movie, I didn't know they really needed to be viewed in order. Since Netflix was dropping Insidious 2 last night, I watched it first. I didn't have access to Insidious at the time, but I have since watched it on Crackle.com (and just noticed it's playing on Syfy channel right now). I don't know where you can watch Insidious 2 right now, but Insidious is still on crackle.com, and I think it's probably the better movie of the two movies, despite the second one basically being a continuation of the first movie, and starring all the cast members from the first one.
So, I'm watching Insidious 2, and I notice, hey, this is a decent horror flick. When I'm about halfway through, my nephew's daughter calls me to say hi. Since I haven't really talked to her in ages, I was a bit surprised. So I'm talking to her and there's a lot of static on the line because of the crappy portable phone. My nephew's daughter sounds just like she used to, which surprises me, because she's a teenager now, and should probably have sounded different than when she was 10 or 11, the last time I remember talking to her. So, we're talking and she asks me what I am watching, and I tell her Insidious part 2, not expecting her to have any idea what that was (especially considering that before last night, I had never even seen the movie). Being a bit of a horror movie fanatic, I'm used to normal people having no idea about the titles of the horror movies I am watching. So she asks me if I have seen the first one yet, or the third one. I confess I didn't even know there was a third one before she mentioned it, and while we're talking the static on the line clears up and she sounds completely different, more like a teenager would sound, and a lot less like my great-niece (or whatever you'd call my nephew's daughter). So she tells me I should probably watch them in order, in the voice of a stranger (since I haven't talked to her in ages), and honestly, this is not the type of girl I would ever have expected to know anything about horror movies. So, yes, after watching a creepy movie and getting a call from my long-lost great-niece, I admit to being a little weirded out by her extensive knowledge of scary movies. If this was an actual horror movie, I'd probably find out in a day or two that my great-niece has actually passed away, and that she died before I spoke to her on the phone. If she has, then I'm going to be REALLY creeped out. :-/ So, sure, all completely normal events, but I guess Insidious sort of got under my skin a bit. It is that kind of movie. As for my great-niece, I'm sure she's fine, and look forward to watching horror-movie marathons with her someday.
So, to sum up. Insidious 1 and 2, pretty decent horror movies. Insidious 3 out now, because they're flashing DVD and Blu-Ray ads for for Insidious 3 all through Insidious on SyFy. Insidious is on crackle.com, and good luck on finding Insidious 2. Also, I'm a bit of a scaredy-cat. Which, is actually a good thing. If scary movies didn't actually scare me sometimes, I probably wouldn't be watching them, right? Right. Don't worry, I usually still sleep like a baby at night, thanks for your concern. ;-)
That's all for tonight. Got some movies lined up for the weekend, so we should be all good for a few days. Enjoy the three day weekend, if you have monday off.
Wednesday, October 7, 2015
Horror Review #6 - #7: Rattlers (1976), The Swarm (1978)
Double feature Wednesday tonight, just because (because I missed posting one last night because I was too busy)! Animal attacks are a pretty common theme in horror movies, and have been for decades. Zoo (2015), the series by James Patterson that played over the summer, is a recent example.
Rattlers (1976) is a pretty typical example of a killer-snake movie that was probably spawned by the blockbuster success of Jaws (1975) the year before. A herpetologist (an expert in reptiles) teaching at a nearby college gets a call from the sheriff of a nearby town. Apparently there have been a small number of fatalities involving snake bites, and the sheriff is looking to get an expert opinion on just what exactly is causing the spike in snake bite deaths. The professor heads down to find out, only to find a swarm of killer rattlesnakes on the loose! :-o
I think my synopsis is actually more exciting than the movie. Rattlers starts out pretty good, illustrating a number of rattlesnake-caused fatalities in fair detail, before falling apart about 2/3rds of the way through. I won't give away any details, in case someone actually wants to check out the movie. I watched it on Turner Classic Movies, on something called the TCM Underground, which is apparently what they call it when they show movies at 3 am.
The lead actors of Rattlers were pretty much completely unidentifiable. Acting was passable for a cheap creature feature of the mid-70's. Special effects consisted of a few rattlers stirred up and placed strategically near some actors. No blood and gore to speak of, nor any nudity. There wasn't a lot of action, and I didn't like the way the movie suddenly changed focus when the professor decided to check out the pattern of attacks. However, I guess there needed to be some reason for the Rattlers to go on the rampage, so the, well, the side/main story was necessary, I suppose. Still, there was a decent build-up, and then things just seemed to go south. The ending was a bit of a disappointment, so not really worth watching again, but not a bad start if you haven't seen the movie.
The only actor of note was Darwin "Got a Smoke?" Joston, whom horror movie fans may remember from both The Fog (1980), where he played Dr. Phibes (the coroner), and Assault on Precinct 13 (1976), where he played Napoleon Wilson, the convicted killer who stops over at Precinct 13 and helps fight off the gang attack. Assault on Precinct 13 was probably his best movie role, and should have led to other roles, but somehow never did. In Rattlers, he plays a doomed army patrolman who is driving through rattler country, though I recognized him by his voice almost immediately. He was actually John Carpenter's next-door neighbor for a while, as I understand it. His appearance in this movie amounts to little more than work as an extra, though he does have a few speaking lines.
The Swarm (1978) is another movie about killer animals, although this time it's bees. An army base is attacked by killer bees, and the force of soldiers sent to rescue the besieged base runs into Dr. Crane, an entomologist tracking a swarm of bees. The soldiers are so disbelieving of Dr. Crane's story, that a swarm of killer bees attacked and killed everyone on the base, that they immediately arrest him and set about confirming his crazy story. When the story turns out to be true, and the killer bees are found to be still on the rampage, Dr. Crane quickly becomes the army's most valuable asset. Can he stop the bees before they attack the nearby town of Marysville? :-o
IMDB.com gives The Swarm a rating of 4.3, though I don't understand why. Michael Caine plays Dr. Crane, and the supporting cast includes Richard Widmark, Olivia de Havilland, Jose Ferrer, Patty Duke, Slim Pickens, Bradford Dillman, Fred Macmurray and Henry Fonda. With that kind of stellar cast, and an ample budget and the best special effects money could buy, you'd think this movie would have garnered better reviews. In any case, the movie plays pretty well. Killer Bees go apeshit and start stinging everyone in their path, and that path includes major cities and small towns. Pretty exciting stuff, if you ask me, and the acting couldn't be better. As with Rattlers, I caught this movie on TCM underground. TCM may play it again at some point this month, or there's probably other ways to catch this movie somewhere.
I like the Swarm much better than I liked Rattlers, mostly for the acting talent. The Swarm typically makes the rounds every once in a while, on Network TV or TCM, so it's at least reasonably popular. If I'm not mistaken, HBO played the shit out of it for a few years before retiring it. Both movies are prime examples of the killer-wildlife motif, though the Swarm most definitely had a bigger budget, better acting talent, and was the better movie, in probably all respects. The Swarm is almost two hours long, so you know a crapload of things happen in it. I suppose you could even call the Swarm one of those big-budget disaster movies, only this time, the natural disaster is bees.
Since neither movie is a comedy, and both focus on animals gone wild (typical horror movie fare), they certainly qualify as horror movies (though they aren't particularly horrifying). The body count in the Swarm is much higher than in Rattlers, and neither movie contains any nudity, but both are worth watching at least once. The Swarm I have seen before, and frankly is a good watch no matter how many times you've seen it. Henry Fonda has a particularly awesome scene that he acts the shit out of, that makes me cringe every time I watch it. Cringeworthy! Very cringe-worthy. And then, all hell breaks loose. heh. Yea, you knew that was coming.
That's all for tonight. Hope you guys can at least catch the Swarm, either by watching it on TCM or some other means. Killer Bee Hell on Earth. :-D Til next time!
Rattlers (1976) is a pretty typical example of a killer-snake movie that was probably spawned by the blockbuster success of Jaws (1975) the year before. A herpetologist (an expert in reptiles) teaching at a nearby college gets a call from the sheriff of a nearby town. Apparently there have been a small number of fatalities involving snake bites, and the sheriff is looking to get an expert opinion on just what exactly is causing the spike in snake bite deaths. The professor heads down to find out, only to find a swarm of killer rattlesnakes on the loose! :-o
I think my synopsis is actually more exciting than the movie. Rattlers starts out pretty good, illustrating a number of rattlesnake-caused fatalities in fair detail, before falling apart about 2/3rds of the way through. I won't give away any details, in case someone actually wants to check out the movie. I watched it on Turner Classic Movies, on something called the TCM Underground, which is apparently what they call it when they show movies at 3 am.
The lead actors of Rattlers were pretty much completely unidentifiable. Acting was passable for a cheap creature feature of the mid-70's. Special effects consisted of a few rattlers stirred up and placed strategically near some actors. No blood and gore to speak of, nor any nudity. There wasn't a lot of action, and I didn't like the way the movie suddenly changed focus when the professor decided to check out the pattern of attacks. However, I guess there needed to be some reason for the Rattlers to go on the rampage, so the, well, the side/main story was necessary, I suppose. Still, there was a decent build-up, and then things just seemed to go south. The ending was a bit of a disappointment, so not really worth watching again, but not a bad start if you haven't seen the movie.
The only actor of note was Darwin "Got a Smoke?" Joston, whom horror movie fans may remember from both The Fog (1980), where he played Dr. Phibes (the coroner), and Assault on Precinct 13 (1976), where he played Napoleon Wilson, the convicted killer who stops over at Precinct 13 and helps fight off the gang attack. Assault on Precinct 13 was probably his best movie role, and should have led to other roles, but somehow never did. In Rattlers, he plays a doomed army patrolman who is driving through rattler country, though I recognized him by his voice almost immediately. He was actually John Carpenter's next-door neighbor for a while, as I understand it. His appearance in this movie amounts to little more than work as an extra, though he does have a few speaking lines.
The Swarm (1978) is another movie about killer animals, although this time it's bees. An army base is attacked by killer bees, and the force of soldiers sent to rescue the besieged base runs into Dr. Crane, an entomologist tracking a swarm of bees. The soldiers are so disbelieving of Dr. Crane's story, that a swarm of killer bees attacked and killed everyone on the base, that they immediately arrest him and set about confirming his crazy story. When the story turns out to be true, and the killer bees are found to be still on the rampage, Dr. Crane quickly becomes the army's most valuable asset. Can he stop the bees before they attack the nearby town of Marysville? :-o
IMDB.com gives The Swarm a rating of 4.3, though I don't understand why. Michael Caine plays Dr. Crane, and the supporting cast includes Richard Widmark, Olivia de Havilland, Jose Ferrer, Patty Duke, Slim Pickens, Bradford Dillman, Fred Macmurray and Henry Fonda. With that kind of stellar cast, and an ample budget and the best special effects money could buy, you'd think this movie would have garnered better reviews. In any case, the movie plays pretty well. Killer Bees go apeshit and start stinging everyone in their path, and that path includes major cities and small towns. Pretty exciting stuff, if you ask me, and the acting couldn't be better. As with Rattlers, I caught this movie on TCM underground. TCM may play it again at some point this month, or there's probably other ways to catch this movie somewhere.
I like the Swarm much better than I liked Rattlers, mostly for the acting talent. The Swarm typically makes the rounds every once in a while, on Network TV or TCM, so it's at least reasonably popular. If I'm not mistaken, HBO played the shit out of it for a few years before retiring it. Both movies are prime examples of the killer-wildlife motif, though the Swarm most definitely had a bigger budget, better acting talent, and was the better movie, in probably all respects. The Swarm is almost two hours long, so you know a crapload of things happen in it. I suppose you could even call the Swarm one of those big-budget disaster movies, only this time, the natural disaster is bees.
Since neither movie is a comedy, and both focus on animals gone wild (typical horror movie fare), they certainly qualify as horror movies (though they aren't particularly horrifying). The body count in the Swarm is much higher than in Rattlers, and neither movie contains any nudity, but both are worth watching at least once. The Swarm I have seen before, and frankly is a good watch no matter how many times you've seen it. Henry Fonda has a particularly awesome scene that he acts the shit out of, that makes me cringe every time I watch it. Cringeworthy! Very cringe-worthy. And then, all hell breaks loose. heh. Yea, you knew that was coming.
That's all for tonight. Hope you guys can at least catch the Swarm, either by watching it on TCM or some other means. Killer Bee Hell on Earth. :-D Til next time!
Tuesday, October 6, 2015
Horror Review #5 - Witchboard (1987)
Ouija boards, also known as spirit boards or Witchboards, have been around for a while. A while being, hundreds if not thousands of years. Typically used to communicate with "The Dead," Ouija boards have been featured in movies for decades, most recently in the movie Ouija (2014). In fact, the movie Witchboard (which I am reviewing tonight), is even listed on the wiki website as a popular culture reference.
Witchboard (1986) starts out with a party. Attending this party are Linda, her boyfriend Jim, and her ex-boyfriend Brandon, who has brought a Ouija Board. Brandon breaks out the old spirit board, and they contact David, the spirit of a little boy who drowned some years ago, that Brandon has been chatting with for some time. The party's a smash hit, everyone goes home schnockered, and Brandon forgets to bring his Ouija board home with him. The next day, Linda decides to contact David, by herself. David and Linda have a chat, and ... well, come on. It's a horror movie. You know what's coming. All hell breaks loose!
For those of you who think it's odd that Brandon roams around with a Ouija board, remember, this was the 80's. Anyone who didn't wander around with a ouija board was considered a major douchebag. I had one tattooed on my ass just so I wouldn't forget to bring one along. In the old days, before the internet, Ouija boards were used like chatroulette. You pretty much let it be known that you were looking to contact someone, and you prayed you didn't end up with a big dick. In Linda's case, she ends up with a really big dick, metaphysically speaking.
Linda is played by Tawny Kitaen, whom some of you may remember from a couple of Whitesnake music videos back in the late 80's, filmed while she was dating the lead singer of the band. She was also in Bachelor Party (1984) with Tom Hanks, when he was still doing comedy, and wasn't a huge star. Tawny Kitaen was pretty much the only "major" star in Witchboard, and while her success didn't quite equal that of Tom Hanks, she did continue to appear in series, movies, and so on. Tawny even has a nude scene in Witchboard, and she was looking pretty fine back then, if you ask me.
As far as horror movies go, this one wan't bad. It was the 80's, so you've got weird psychics, metaphysical research, and visits to magic shops to see what the hell was going on back in the day, when they didn't have a scooby gang handy. Aside from the nude scene (nude scenes were pretty much required in horror movies back in the 80's), there are several bloody deaths, a couple seances, and some generally spooky goings-on. Special effects aren't exactly cutting edge, and the acting is mediocre, but how much do you really need in a horror movie? There's a killer spirit, a hot chick, a shower scene, and lots of blood and guts. That's plenty for a horror flick, and this isn't the first time I've seen this movie, so it has a fair amount of rewatchability. Witchboard is on Encore Suspense this month if you want to check it out.
Okay, that's enough of a review. It's late and I need sleep. I hope everyone likes the new blog layout and background. Til next time.
Witchboard (1986) starts out with a party. Attending this party are Linda, her boyfriend Jim, and her ex-boyfriend Brandon, who has brought a Ouija Board. Brandon breaks out the old spirit board, and they contact David, the spirit of a little boy who drowned some years ago, that Brandon has been chatting with for some time. The party's a smash hit, everyone goes home schnockered, and Brandon forgets to bring his Ouija board home with him. The next day, Linda decides to contact David, by herself. David and Linda have a chat, and ... well, come on. It's a horror movie. You know what's coming. All hell breaks loose!
For those of you who think it's odd that Brandon roams around with a Ouija board, remember, this was the 80's. Anyone who didn't wander around with a ouija board was considered a major douchebag. I had one tattooed on my ass just so I wouldn't forget to bring one along. In the old days, before the internet, Ouija boards were used like chatroulette. You pretty much let it be known that you were looking to contact someone, and you prayed you didn't end up with a big dick. In Linda's case, she ends up with a really big dick, metaphysically speaking.
Linda is played by Tawny Kitaen, whom some of you may remember from a couple of Whitesnake music videos back in the late 80's, filmed while she was dating the lead singer of the band. She was also in Bachelor Party (1984) with Tom Hanks, when he was still doing comedy, and wasn't a huge star. Tawny Kitaen was pretty much the only "major" star in Witchboard, and while her success didn't quite equal that of Tom Hanks, she did continue to appear in series, movies, and so on. Tawny even has a nude scene in Witchboard, and she was looking pretty fine back then, if you ask me.
As far as horror movies go, this one wan't bad. It was the 80's, so you've got weird psychics, metaphysical research, and visits to magic shops to see what the hell was going on back in the day, when they didn't have a scooby gang handy. Aside from the nude scene (nude scenes were pretty much required in horror movies back in the 80's), there are several bloody deaths, a couple seances, and some generally spooky goings-on. Special effects aren't exactly cutting edge, and the acting is mediocre, but how much do you really need in a horror movie? There's a killer spirit, a hot chick, a shower scene, and lots of blood and guts. That's plenty for a horror flick, and this isn't the first time I've seen this movie, so it has a fair amount of rewatchability. Witchboard is on Encore Suspense this month if you want to check it out.
Okay, that's enough of a review. It's late and I need sleep. I hope everyone likes the new blog layout and background. Til next time.
Sunday, October 4, 2015
Horror Review #4 - Curse of Chucky (2013)
I have seen all the Chucky movies, I admit it. Back when I was just a young horror movie lover, stories about killer dolls were actually pretty common, what with Chucky and the Puppet Master series of movies. You don't see too many stories about killer dolls now, unless we're talking about the Stepford Wives, but maybe a new Chucky movie is a sign of a resurgence in the genre! Oh geez. I said 'genre.' Now I sound like an artsy, snobby, movie critic type fella. Sorry.
Curse of Chucky (2013) starts out with a delivery. A seemingly innocent mother and daughter get a package, and damned if it doesn't contain a 'Good Guy' doll. Being a fan of the Chucky series, I already know this is a bad thing. No 'Good Guy' doll is ever a good guy. Trust me on this. Needless to say, shortly after the doll arrives, the bodies start piling up.
Curse of Chucky is short on plot. Usually the Chucky movies give some kind of explanation as to how the Chucky doll gets reborn, movie after movie, but I can't quite recall how the last chucky movie ended, so I'm not even sure if the doll got destroyed. That having been said, there's sort of an explanation at the end as to how everything gets started, so you'll have to watch til the end to figure out the beginning. It's sort of convoluted, but it's mostly all there. Unfortunately, you'll have to have seen a few chucky movies to realize WTF is going on. (shrug) I could explain, but it would give away the end, and I don't want to do that, do I? Curse of Chucky is on Netflix, if you want to check it out for yourselves, but I still have to say a few things about the movie.
Aside from the odd beginning, it pretty much works like every other Chucky movie. The Chucky movies work because nobody realizes the doll is actually alive. Chucky's typical schtick is to blame everything on someone else, so he has a patsy to blame while Chucky the Doll sits innocently nearby, not doing a damn thing. All the blame conveniently falls on the nearby surviving humans, and Chucky is free to move on to the next group of victims. The tricksy bastard. In this particular case, the movie gets a little scarier because there's a woman in a wheelchair involved, which is just plain mean. Chucky is an equal-opportunity killer doll, though, that much is true. He picks on kids, women, men, cripples, anyone he can get alone. I mean, he is a doll and all. Taking on armed mobs of folks is a little out of his league. He's no Jason Voorhees, that's for sure.
This movie was an okay horror flick, though. It stands well enough on its own to scare you, even if you haven't seen the other chucky movies, though you may not be able to follow the end too well. I mean, it's not terrifying or anything, but as far as a psycho-killer-horror-slasher-flick goes, this one isn't too bad. Brad Dourif plays the voice of Chucky, as always, and flashback scenes of Charles Lee Ray (the killer Chucky used to be when he was alive). Additional actors include Fiona Dourif (Brad's actual daughter) as the hot girl in the wheelchair, and Maitland McConnell (of Ninja Cheerleader fame) as the hot lesbian nanny. No nude scenes, so I probably won't watch this one over and over again (hey, I don't get out much), but the movie works okay without it. Yea, I know, nude scenes aren't technically required for most horror movies, but they make it so much better! :-D
Okay, I am four for four! Twenty seven horror movie reviews to go! I CAN DO THIS! Maybe. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can... Yes, I am the little engine that could. What will I review tomorrow? I have no idea! Let's hope I can find something, otherwise, shit's going to get real hairy real quick, and not just because I am a member of the hair replacement club for men! Well. Mostly because of that reason. Til next time.
Curse of Chucky (2013) starts out with a delivery. A seemingly innocent mother and daughter get a package, and damned if it doesn't contain a 'Good Guy' doll. Being a fan of the Chucky series, I already know this is a bad thing. No 'Good Guy' doll is ever a good guy. Trust me on this. Needless to say, shortly after the doll arrives, the bodies start piling up.
Curse of Chucky is short on plot. Usually the Chucky movies give some kind of explanation as to how the Chucky doll gets reborn, movie after movie, but I can't quite recall how the last chucky movie ended, so I'm not even sure if the doll got destroyed. That having been said, there's sort of an explanation at the end as to how everything gets started, so you'll have to watch til the end to figure out the beginning. It's sort of convoluted, but it's mostly all there. Unfortunately, you'll have to have seen a few chucky movies to realize WTF is going on. (shrug) I could explain, but it would give away the end, and I don't want to do that, do I? Curse of Chucky is on Netflix, if you want to check it out for yourselves, but I still have to say a few things about the movie.
Aside from the odd beginning, it pretty much works like every other Chucky movie. The Chucky movies work because nobody realizes the doll is actually alive. Chucky's typical schtick is to blame everything on someone else, so he has a patsy to blame while Chucky the Doll sits innocently nearby, not doing a damn thing. All the blame conveniently falls on the nearby surviving humans, and Chucky is free to move on to the next group of victims. The tricksy bastard. In this particular case, the movie gets a little scarier because there's a woman in a wheelchair involved, which is just plain mean. Chucky is an equal-opportunity killer doll, though, that much is true. He picks on kids, women, men, cripples, anyone he can get alone. I mean, he is a doll and all. Taking on armed mobs of folks is a little out of his league. He's no Jason Voorhees, that's for sure.
This movie was an okay horror flick, though. It stands well enough on its own to scare you, even if you haven't seen the other chucky movies, though you may not be able to follow the end too well. I mean, it's not terrifying or anything, but as far as a psycho-killer-horror-slasher-flick goes, this one isn't too bad. Brad Dourif plays the voice of Chucky, as always, and flashback scenes of Charles Lee Ray (the killer Chucky used to be when he was alive). Additional actors include Fiona Dourif (Brad's actual daughter) as the hot girl in the wheelchair, and Maitland McConnell (of Ninja Cheerleader fame) as the hot lesbian nanny. No nude scenes, so I probably won't watch this one over and over again (hey, I don't get out much), but the movie works okay without it. Yea, I know, nude scenes aren't technically required for most horror movies, but they make it so much better! :-D
Okay, I am four for four! Twenty seven horror movie reviews to go! I CAN DO THIS! Maybe. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can... Yes, I am the little engine that could. What will I review tomorrow? I have no idea! Let's hope I can find something, otherwise, shit's going to get real hairy real quick, and not just because I am a member of the hair replacement club for men! Well. Mostly because of that reason. Til next time.
Saturday, October 3, 2015
Horror Review #2-3 - Night of the Wild (2015), Daybreakers (2009)
Two reviews tonight, to keep me up to date on my Horror-movie-review-a-thon's 31 days of horror movie reviews. Let's start with Daybreakers, because I'm watching Night of the Wild on Syfy right now.
Daybreakers (2009) is a movie about vampires. In the year 2019, Vampires have taken over the world. Nearly every human has been bitten, sucked on, and turned into a fellow vampire. In this movie, every human bitten turns into a vampire, so basically the entire population of the earth is either already a vampire, or food. Pockets of human resistance remain in hiding, sought out by teams of vampire hunter-soldiers. Vampires are searching for a synthetic substitute for blood, but so far, haven't found one yet. That means, the supply of human blood is quickly running out. Enter Edward Dalton (Ethan Hawke), the vampire researcher in charge of looking for the synthetic blood substitute, who stumbles upon a group of humans looking for vampires sympathetic to their cause.
I don't normally like vampire movies, but this one is a little different. First off, all the vampire-turning and the melodrama associated with that has already happened before the movie even starts. Vampires aren't the unusual thing in this movie, they're the norm. One of the best parts early on is a scene where a bunch of normal-looking humans are standing around waiting for the subway at night, and a train goes by on the other track. In the middle of the group is Edward Dalton, puffing on a cigarette. The shadow of the passing train envelops the group of people in darkness, and all you can see of them are their silhouettes and their glowing eyes.
Ethan Hawke plays Edward Dalton, the vampire scientist looking for a cure, and he's the lead actor. Supporting cast includes Sam Neill as the evil guy in charge of the corporation looking to fund the synthetic blood, but doesn't really want it for himself, because he prefers human blood. Willem Dafoe plays 'Elvis,' a former vampire turned human, who helps Edward in his quest for a cure. The rest of the supporting cast includes dozens of random vampires who are slowly starving to death, turning into savage half-bat vampire-hobos as their hunger turns their vampiric bodies into killing machines on the hunt for blood. I'm guessing the movie had a good budget, due to the supporting cast, various location shoots and slightly-futuristic tech in the year 2019.
This movie wasn't the best vampire movie ever made (an understatement to be sure), but it's interesting for two main reasons. One is, the vampiric powers normally associated with vampires (turning into bats, unable to be caught on camera, etc) are actually hindrances for the vampires in this movie. When the entire populace is all vampires, turning into a bat is so unnecessary that normal vampires don't even know how to do it anymore, and are terrified when they run into a starving vampire that is half-mutated into a bat. Newscasters can't broadcast, nor can vampires see themselves in a mirror, so technology had to be invented to overcome this. It's like vampires were never intended to overcome humanity, so when they did, they had no idea how to adapt.
The second reason I like this movie is 'the cure.' I'm not going to give anything away, in case anyone wants to look for this movie on Syfy (where I saw it), but I like how the cure comes about. It's like it was built into the human race, and maybe it was, because this movie draws on real biology to come up with a cure, without getting bogged down in the details of it. As I said, I can't really go into details without giving away the movie, but I just thought it was interesting how the cure worked out.
As an aside here, let me just say that Sam Neill is possibly the most underrated actor to ever grace a horror movie, and has probably been in every horror movie I have ever seen. Event Horizon? Check. In The Mouth of Madness? Check. Sure, the Jurassic Park series may be what he's best known for, but he's also played opposite Nicole Kidman (Dead Calm), Sigourney Weaver (Snow White: A tale of Terror), and even Robort Redford (the Horse Whisperer) and the late Robin Williams (Bicentennial man). Those last two were admittedly not horror movies, but the man has such a range of talent that he probably played every single role in The Shining, and we just haven't figured it out yet. And yes, I can see Scatman Crothers talking about 'the shining' with little Danny, and suddenly pulling off his latex rubber mask, and revealing the evil, grinning face of Sam Neill. Shit, if I was Danny, I'd probably have shat myself. I'm sure he did the voiceovers for Danny's little finger (Rrrrrredrrrrumm), and through the magic of hollywood, even played the two creepy little girls ("Come play with us! Play with us... for eeevvvvveeerrrrrrrrr..."). I bet you didn't know Shelley Duvall was actually one of Sam Neill's aliases, did you? Well, now you do. Jack Nicholson? He doesn't actually exist. Jack's just the identity Sam Neill uses when he's on a bender.
Next up is Night of the Wild (2015) a brand new Asylum production. Yes, I know, this is a Syfy movie, and they do so love those crappy Asylum flicks. Night of the Wild is about a meteorite that explodes in contact with earth's atmosphere, and showers an entire town with meteorite fragments. These fragments glow green, give off odd vapors, and seem to really piss off the local dog population. Since the entire town and surrounding forest seem filled with pet dogs and wild dogs, this presents a problem for the humans, which quickly become dog food. Think Hitchcock's 'The Birds,' only with dogs instead. There's also a lot more barking, human dismemberment, and ... well, about the same amount of screaming, I think.
Rob Morrow (of Northern Exposure fame) and Kelly Rutherford star in it. Kelly Rutherford looks familiar to me for some reason, but after looking through her list of movies on IMDB.com, I can't figure out why. The rest of the cast is only there to be eaten, I think. There's a lot of dogs in this movie. In fact, I think the entire cast of 101 dalmatians is in it. I mean, they're probably been out of work since that movie, so I can understand why they'd need to bring home the bacon, because... wait, what? 101 Dalmatians was animated? The dogs in that movie weren't real? Shit. Well. I swear I just saw a dalmatian. I just assumed... oh well.
This movie starts out with the action pretty early on, and doesn't really let up til the end, so in that respect, there's not a lot of suspense and buildup. We get right into the action, and I like those kinds of movies. Sure, suspense is great if you have a good plot and good actors, but that's pretty rare, especially in an Asylum flick. It's good that they get right into the action. They are playing on their strengths. I'm not sure how real the special effects in this movie are. It's possible they just hired a lot of actors, bought a lot of dogs, and then didn't feed the dogs for a while. Then, they started the cameras rolling, and let the dogs loose. That would be a decent movie, if they didn't mind losing the lead actors here and there. I'm joking, of course. I'm sure every effort was made to ensure the safety of the lead actors, and probably the dogs, too. So, if they lost a few animals (or people) to rabies, that's just a hazard of the fame and fortune that comes with acting! I'm sure Rob Morrow knows what I am talking about, because I sure as hell don't.
Well, that's all we have for our Saturday night double feature! I've just noticed that Netflix has the latest Chucky movie (yes, they broke that old series out of storage), so I'm probably going to review that movie tomorrow night. Looking forward to it, actually. Three days into October, three movies reviewed! Can I review one movie for each day in October? Who knows! I guess we'll find out! Til next time, or until I epic fail!
Friday, October 2, 2015
October Horror-thon Begins with Young Frankenstein (1974)
No, I know what you're thinking. Young Frankenstein? That's not a horror movie, that's a comedy! Yea. Yea it is. And I'm not really going to make any sort of argument that there are scary moments in this picture. Well. Except the part at the very beginning where he puts the clip on the guy's spine, and then knees the old geezer in the nards. Oh, and the part where Frau Blucher (lightning, thunder, horse whinny) is playing that creepy violin music, and we don't know where it's coming from, yet. Sure, those are some creepy moments, certainly not very scary. Well. There is that part where he stabs himself in the leg with the scalpel. Okay, that is just impressive. But wait, wait. Let me break it down for you.
Young Frankenstein (1974) is a modern (cough, ahem, modern for 1974) retelling of the old tale of Dr. Frankenstein and his reanimated creature. Froderich Frankenstein (that's pronounced Frahnk en steen), a distant grandson of the evil genius Baron Victor Frankenstein, is teaching medical classes in America when he receives some disturbing news. Apparently, he is the only remaining heir and now-owner of Castle Frankenstein. Heading overseas to collect his inheritance, Froderich is a man of science, and denies any belief in his grandfather's experiments. However, shortly after arriving at the castle, Froderich discovers his grandfather's scientific journal, and embarks on a mad quest to duplicate the baron's success.
Froderich, played hilariously by Gene Wilder, is joined by a great supporting cast. Marty Feldman plays Ygor (that's pronounced Eye-gore), Dr. Frankenstein's assistant. Teri Garr plays Inga, a deliciously attractive german girl who tags along for the zany ride. Cloris Leachman plays Frau Blucher (lightning, thunder, horse whinny), a former employee of the Castle, devoted servant of the old Baron. Peter Boyle (perhaps more familiar as the aged father from Everyone Loves Raymond, who is now as deceased as Marty Feldman, sadly) plays the Monster. Gene Hackman even makes an appearance as a lonely Friar looking for company!
This movie, which I believe was directed by Mel Brooks, is one of the funniest movies I have ever seen. Every time I see it, I find something new in it that makes me cackle hilariously, just like the movie Airplane! Yes, it's originally in black and white, and yes, it was made back in 1974, but the comedic talents of the cast make it one helluva rib-tickler. So, maybe it's not so scary you piss yourself from the opening scene to the end credits, but it's a long month, and we're only just getting started. Watch Young Frankenstein on OuterMax (a sub-channel of Cinemax) this month, have a good laugh, and get ready for your month of terror... because real madness always begins with laughter, doesn't it? ;-)
Sleepy Hollow is returning for a third season on Fox, running at 9pm on Thursday nights, apparently. After barely managing to get through Heroes Reborn earlier this evening, I found Sleepy Hollow to be as boring as ever. Ichabod Crane and the Leftenant return as Witnesses, confronting the various evils that crop up in Sleepy Hollow at the beginning of every harvest season. Unfortunately, just like the last couple seasons, Sleepy Hollow manages to take everything cool about the supernatural and talk it to death. Every evil that crops up has been catalogued, discussed, and dissected 200 years before the start of the series, allowing the tiny, imitation scooby gang to read about it in a book, find out how to kill it, and invariably gab on and on about it until the aforementioned creature dies of historical ennui. Sure, there's a little shooting and sorcery involved, in the most civilized and bloodless manner that can possibly be shown on TV, narrated by Ichabod's smarmy english accent that grates on your nerves unceasingly until you're ready to start the revolutionary war all over again, just to make him shut up already. I don't even know why I keep checking out this series, other than to see how they can make yet another cool supernatural beastie appear completely claw-less, tooth-less and harmless. These monsters are supposed to be scary, not weekly reminders of how awesome the founding fathers were. We get it, all right? The Founding Fathers WERE awesome. But reminding us every week, by reading some musty old book supposedly penned by Benjamin Franklin, really doesn't seem like the best way to get through EVERY episode. Meh. Maybe I'm wrong.
That's all for the first movie review of October! Hopefully, many horror movie reviews to come. I may have reviewed Young Frankenstein in some previous year, but let's face it, there's so much crap floating around masquerading as horror that there's no way I can search through all of it and still have time to eat and sleep. I will review what I can find to watch, and hopefully, most of it will be enjoyable. The October Horror Movie Review-a-thon has officially begun! :-D
Young Frankenstein (1974) is a modern (cough, ahem, modern for 1974) retelling of the old tale of Dr. Frankenstein and his reanimated creature. Froderich Frankenstein (that's pronounced Frahnk en steen), a distant grandson of the evil genius Baron Victor Frankenstein, is teaching medical classes in America when he receives some disturbing news. Apparently, he is the only remaining heir and now-owner of Castle Frankenstein. Heading overseas to collect his inheritance, Froderich is a man of science, and denies any belief in his grandfather's experiments. However, shortly after arriving at the castle, Froderich discovers his grandfather's scientific journal, and embarks on a mad quest to duplicate the baron's success.
Froderich, played hilariously by Gene Wilder, is joined by a great supporting cast. Marty Feldman plays Ygor (that's pronounced Eye-gore), Dr. Frankenstein's assistant. Teri Garr plays Inga, a deliciously attractive german girl who tags along for the zany ride. Cloris Leachman plays Frau Blucher (lightning, thunder, horse whinny), a former employee of the Castle, devoted servant of the old Baron. Peter Boyle (perhaps more familiar as the aged father from Everyone Loves Raymond, who is now as deceased as Marty Feldman, sadly) plays the Monster. Gene Hackman even makes an appearance as a lonely Friar looking for company!
This movie, which I believe was directed by Mel Brooks, is one of the funniest movies I have ever seen. Every time I see it, I find something new in it that makes me cackle hilariously, just like the movie Airplane! Yes, it's originally in black and white, and yes, it was made back in 1974, but the comedic talents of the cast make it one helluva rib-tickler. So, maybe it's not so scary you piss yourself from the opening scene to the end credits, but it's a long month, and we're only just getting started. Watch Young Frankenstein on OuterMax (a sub-channel of Cinemax) this month, have a good laugh, and get ready for your month of terror... because real madness always begins with laughter, doesn't it? ;-)
Sleepy Hollow is returning for a third season on Fox, running at 9pm on Thursday nights, apparently. After barely managing to get through Heroes Reborn earlier this evening, I found Sleepy Hollow to be as boring as ever. Ichabod Crane and the Leftenant return as Witnesses, confronting the various evils that crop up in Sleepy Hollow at the beginning of every harvest season. Unfortunately, just like the last couple seasons, Sleepy Hollow manages to take everything cool about the supernatural and talk it to death. Every evil that crops up has been catalogued, discussed, and dissected 200 years before the start of the series, allowing the tiny, imitation scooby gang to read about it in a book, find out how to kill it, and invariably gab on and on about it until the aforementioned creature dies of historical ennui. Sure, there's a little shooting and sorcery involved, in the most civilized and bloodless manner that can possibly be shown on TV, narrated by Ichabod's smarmy english accent that grates on your nerves unceasingly until you're ready to start the revolutionary war all over again, just to make him shut up already. I don't even know why I keep checking out this series, other than to see how they can make yet another cool supernatural beastie appear completely claw-less, tooth-less and harmless. These monsters are supposed to be scary, not weekly reminders of how awesome the founding fathers were. We get it, all right? The Founding Fathers WERE awesome. But reminding us every week, by reading some musty old book supposedly penned by Benjamin Franklin, really doesn't seem like the best way to get through EVERY episode. Meh. Maybe I'm wrong.
That's all for the first movie review of October! Hopefully, many horror movie reviews to come. I may have reviewed Young Frankenstein in some previous year, but let's face it, there's so much crap floating around masquerading as horror that there's no way I can search through all of it and still have time to eat and sleep. I will review what I can find to watch, and hopefully, most of it will be enjoyable. The October Horror Movie Review-a-thon has officially begun! :-D
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