The End of the World is NIGH!

"Nigh" means near, in case you don't know.

So I heard the end of the world is tomorrow. Or, wait, no, not the end of the world, per se. Tomorrow is "The Rapture." as I understand it. So, what's supposed to happen is, the "faithful" are going to be magically called home, and then 5 months of strife will follow this time, and then the world will end in earthquakes and upheavals and you know, end of the world type stuff.

These sorts of end of the world things are pretty normal this type of year. Everyone's been ripping on it, pretty much. David Letterman, Bill Maher, you know, anyone with a sarcastic, sardonic sense of humor has been making fun of it.

But then, I got worried. You see, "Macho Man" Randy Savage got called home. I'm not sure what the proper form of the verb is, whether I'm supposed to say, he got raptured, or he joined the rapture, or he was rapturized, or whatever, but come on. The man was a wrestling legend and he's driving behind the wheel of his car and BAM next thing you know, he's gone and the car hits a tree and his wife, who was in the passenger seat, is FINE. Minor scratches. What else can you call that? I mean seriously, the man is driving along, probably chatting to his wife, next thing you know, he's gone forever and she's going "oh, damn, I broke a nail. You all right hon? Randy?!?" Yea.

Now, I hear New Guinea just had a 6.5 earthquake. I thought there was supposed to be 5 months before the earthquakes? :-o

Maybe they meant 5 hours. Damn.

Still, if that means Macho Man Randy Savage is leading god's armies in the final battle against the minions of hell, I'm IN! Got my slim jim and everything!

OOHHHHHH YEEEEAAAAAAAAAA BABY!!!!!!

THE END IS NIGH!!! REPENT!!! REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPENT!!!!

Repent, I believe, mean to pent a second time. What pent means, I have no idea.

PS: This post is by no means making fun of wrestling legend Randy Savage's death. Me and all my comrades shall wear our spandex tights in honor at the local bar this evening, and have many many fine drinks in his honor. I suggest a memorial drink, appropriately titled "The Slim Jim" or "The Macho Man" be created, of equal parts vodka, tequila, and whiskey, and every time we drink one, we can remember our dear wrestling hero, and then, remember nothing more for the evening.