Okay, I'm not even going to apologize for loving Kung Fu Panda and the sequel, Kung Fu Panda 2. Sure, I'm an adult male, and traditionally, adult males are supposed to like action, car chases, and boobfests. I must admit to liking the boobfests. And action. And car chases, come to think of it. But that's not my point! My point is, I'm entitled to enjoy watching whatever I like, and far from making me "uncool," because I like the occasional cartoon, it makes me the coolest person ever, because I don't let other people decide things for me. I'm a chubby, hairy, 270 pound gorilla of a man, and I like cartoons! If you got a problem with that, well... take it up with my mom. She'll kick your ass.
I loved the first Kung Fu Panda. I totally identified with Po, the main character, voiced by Jack Black. Who, as we all know, is pretty cool. Why did I identify with Po? Because he's fat, always hungry, and people made fun of him all the time, too! Erm, also, I wanted to learn Kung Fu when I was a kid. It's true. I never actually did learn kung fu, but honestly, just like Tigress says to Po in the second movie, when Po expressed an interest in learning a harder style of kung fu: "I don't think it's... your thing." Kung Fu is probably not my thing.
Kung Fu Panda 2, however, is a really nice movie. Just like the first one, it's very streamlined. The movie never drags. It's excitement and action and laughs from beginning to end. Completely unlike Po, there is no fat on this movie. There's a solid message, I've seen it twice already, and laughed uproariously the whole time.
Just to illustrate one part (and hopefully this doesn't ruin the movie for you), Po faces down his arch-nemesis from the top of a building, shouting down at him while the villain holds Po's friends captive. Unfortunately, Po is so far away from the villain that nothing of Po's rousing speech can be made out at all, so the villain keeps asking "What?" until finally, Po takes off his straw hat, and hurls it with all his force at the chains holding his friends captive! Unfortunately, the straw hat flies about 30 feet, then veers off its course and flutters about in the wind, falling to the ground ineffectually. At which point, Po hides his face, as if no one saw that complete and utter failure on his part. I giggled like a school girl on crack. It reminded me of me so much, it was like watching home movies.
I am pretty sure they are going to make a kung fu panda 3. I don't really see why they wouldn't. I'm not sure how well the second one did at the box office, but if the first one did so well they made a second, and the second one was just as good (which it seemed to be), then I am all for making a third. To be completely honest, I have seen the first Kung Fu Panda about 30 or 40 times now. Much like a small child whose parents put the same video on for them to watch a hundred times, I still enjoy watching Kung Fu Panda. I was almost going to watch it again tonight, after having seen the second movie for the second time, but I ran across Bridge on the River Kwai, which I hadn't actually seen before, so decided to watch that instead.
I also saw another movie earlier, Dazed and Confused. It's a 1993 movie about a bunch of high-schoolers graduating in 1976. There's a lot of stars in this movie, making either their first appearances or rounding out the cast, like Milla Jovovish and Mathew Mconaghey or however you spell his name. I found this movie quite odd. It starts out on the last day of school, which first attracted me to watching it. There's nothing like the feeling of the last day of school, I often dream about it. All through spring you want to leave school and just go out and have fun, and finally the school year is over and you are released! For at least three months, in most cases, but anyway, I am sure you know what I mean. I suspect it's like a prisoner being released from a long confinement, when the steel doors finally open up and you're free to go. At least, that's what it always felt like to me.
In any case, this movie didn't seem to be about that at all. For almost the entirety of the movie, the high-schoolers seemed to be chasing down the younger boys at the junior high school nearby in order to give them paddlings. I'm not really sure where the writer of this movie grew up or what the rules there were, but I can't say as I ever recall a bunch of older high school boys chasing me down all over town to give me a paddling, and I only graduated 12 years later. Now I don't see anything wrong with being gay, but if chasing down young boys in order to paddle them doesn't scream of unwanted homosexual pedophilia to me, I'm not sure what does. But hey! I've seen reviews of this movie on netflix, and people who say they graduated in 1976 rave about how realistic this movie is, sooo... I guess I'm glad that by the time I was headed for graduation, those roving bands of spankers had become a thing of the past. Yea.
The rest of the movie is pretty much a bunch of 14 to 18 year olds driving around, playing pool, drinking beer and smoking pot. There's some sort of message there about not bowing down to the man, drinking and smoking pot as much as you please, because that's all that seems to happen in this movie. There's no sex, no nudity, no real violence and nothing really heartwarming or moving seems to happen at all. I was watching this sort of commercial on Turner Classic Movies between war movies earlier today and some famed director said that there should always be a point to a movie, otherwise, why make it? But this movie seems to be the exception to that rule. I don't see a point to having made it, but perhaps watching it while smoking, drinking and perhaps being paddled would make me enjoy it more. Hmmmm. No. I don't think that's ever going to happen.
I also don't think I'd ever watch it again, other than if I was hopelessly in love with Milla Jovovich and absolutely had to see every movie she's ever made. While she is quite scrumptious, I don't think her rare appearances in this movie make it watchable. Ben Affleck running around as the main, ah, "paddler" is not only not surprising, but in retrospect, totally understandable. Matthew mconaghey (never could spell his name right) appears here as a drunken older stoner looking to hook up with freshmen girls... Which, probably is so much like his real life persona that this wasn't even acting for him. Seriously, have you ever heard him try and speak coherently when he didn't have a script? But then i don't guess women care much if he speaks or not. (shrug)
Well, I hope everyone had a nice Memorial Day! With temps near 90 here already, I'm hoping the rest of summer is just as nice and toasty! :-)
Monday, May 28, 2012
Game of Thrones
So I'm watching Game of Thrones on HBO.
And it's a decent show. I read the books, so I know what's going on, and I know the writer's working on the show as well, so it's pretty close to the books. I am watching the second to last episode of this season, and I find that The Onion Knight seems to be the most honorable person in the entire series.
Let's review the story so far. Fair King Robert Baratheon is dead, causing a power struggle amongst the various lords of the 7 kingdoms. There's a king in the north, Rob Stark, son of the slain Hand of the King, who was Robert's good friend, Ned Stark. Ned WAS the most honorable man in the kingdom, but honor didn't help him much. He was honor bound to report Robert's queen's betrayal of Robert, but before he could report it, Robert was killed and Ned met his end at the headsman's blade. This caused a power struggle amongst the remaining 7 kingdoms.
Rob Stark wants vengeance for his father's death, but his claim to be King of the North is not honorable. He knows Stannis Baratheon, Robert's brother, has the most valid claim on the throne, but nobody likes Stannis, so Rob's gathered an army and is trying to free the North and take the throne in vengeance. He's good-hearted, but not entirely honorable.
Stannis Baratheon, while he has the most valid claim on the throne, has allied himself with an evil force known as the Red Witch. He had no compunctions about using that power to cut down his younger brother, who challenged his claim to the throne with a superior force of knights. So while his claim may be honorable, the man himself is not.
Now the Onion Knight, formerly a smuggler, is now Stannis's right-hand man. The Onion Knight supports Stannis because Stannis has the most valid claim to the throne, so that's honorable. He's formerly a smuggler, but he forsook his smuggler's ways to help Stannis in time of need, and Stannis pardoned him. So despite being a former smuggler, he's still served Stannis honorably since the time of his pardon. Also, though he serves a dishonorable man, the Onion Knight (so called because he brought onions to a starving populace and staved off their deaths) has not joined in worship of the Red god, and suspects (rightly) the red witch of the darkest deeds. So despite supporting a man who he knows is not honorable, the Onion Knight is doing his best to honor both his liege's rightful claim to the throne, and his friendship with Stannis.
But, I think the Onion Knight just died in the siege against the capital city. So who does that leave?
No idea. I like Tyrion best, though. He's not honorable, but he's good-hearted and is doing his best to survive both his birth amongst the greedy and evil-hearted Lannisters, and the fact that not only his own clan dislikes him, but just about every other king or clan in the 7 kingdoms hates him. He's also a dwarf, but a smart one, and trying to survive a war for the crown. I hope he makes it!
In other news, the family picnic was fun, although the pine trees in the area were dropping so much pollen that my entire car was coated in yellow. I can't imagine how much landed on my food or ended up in my lungs, but I had to clean my glasses several times just to get the tinge of yellow off of everything. My brother, of course, did not show up, but told his wife the picnic was cancelled, which of course, wasn't true. But then, I hardly expected him to suddenly be honest with her and say "Sorry hon, we WERE going to the picnic, but I fucked up, disowned my brother for no reason and told my whole family to go fuck themselves in a violent display of temper because I have no self control and can't stand being caught in a lie."
Ah well. Supposedly the whole world is going to end in 6 months anyway, or was that today? I don't really recall how that whole end of the world theory works, but I think it's a truckload of rubbish. There's no reason whatsoever to think the world isn't going to keep on being just as fucked up as it is now, for a good long time yet. So don't go maxing out your credit cards just yet!
Now, I have to go take some tylenol just to ease the pain enough to sleep tonight. Too much work on a neck injury does it little good, not to mention the sudden leg injury i got yesterday. Getting old sucks! I don't recommend it. One star out of ten, just for the wisdom you get as you grow older, assuming you don't lose your brains to alzheimers. I would not get old again if I could help it.
And no, it's nothing serious. A few days of rest and I'll be good as new. Happy Memorial Day!
And it's a decent show. I read the books, so I know what's going on, and I know the writer's working on the show as well, so it's pretty close to the books. I am watching the second to last episode of this season, and I find that The Onion Knight seems to be the most honorable person in the entire series.
Let's review the story so far. Fair King Robert Baratheon is dead, causing a power struggle amongst the various lords of the 7 kingdoms. There's a king in the north, Rob Stark, son of the slain Hand of the King, who was Robert's good friend, Ned Stark. Ned WAS the most honorable man in the kingdom, but honor didn't help him much. He was honor bound to report Robert's queen's betrayal of Robert, but before he could report it, Robert was killed and Ned met his end at the headsman's blade. This caused a power struggle amongst the remaining 7 kingdoms.
Rob Stark wants vengeance for his father's death, but his claim to be King of the North is not honorable. He knows Stannis Baratheon, Robert's brother, has the most valid claim on the throne, but nobody likes Stannis, so Rob's gathered an army and is trying to free the North and take the throne in vengeance. He's good-hearted, but not entirely honorable.
Stannis Baratheon, while he has the most valid claim on the throne, has allied himself with an evil force known as the Red Witch. He had no compunctions about using that power to cut down his younger brother, who challenged his claim to the throne with a superior force of knights. So while his claim may be honorable, the man himself is not.
Now the Onion Knight, formerly a smuggler, is now Stannis's right-hand man. The Onion Knight supports Stannis because Stannis has the most valid claim to the throne, so that's honorable. He's formerly a smuggler, but he forsook his smuggler's ways to help Stannis in time of need, and Stannis pardoned him. So despite being a former smuggler, he's still served Stannis honorably since the time of his pardon. Also, though he serves a dishonorable man, the Onion Knight (so called because he brought onions to a starving populace and staved off their deaths) has not joined in worship of the Red god, and suspects (rightly) the red witch of the darkest deeds. So despite supporting a man who he knows is not honorable, the Onion Knight is doing his best to honor both his liege's rightful claim to the throne, and his friendship with Stannis.
But, I think the Onion Knight just died in the siege against the capital city. So who does that leave?
No idea. I like Tyrion best, though. He's not honorable, but he's good-hearted and is doing his best to survive both his birth amongst the greedy and evil-hearted Lannisters, and the fact that not only his own clan dislikes him, but just about every other king or clan in the 7 kingdoms hates him. He's also a dwarf, but a smart one, and trying to survive a war for the crown. I hope he makes it!
In other news, the family picnic was fun, although the pine trees in the area were dropping so much pollen that my entire car was coated in yellow. I can't imagine how much landed on my food or ended up in my lungs, but I had to clean my glasses several times just to get the tinge of yellow off of everything. My brother, of course, did not show up, but told his wife the picnic was cancelled, which of course, wasn't true. But then, I hardly expected him to suddenly be honest with her and say "Sorry hon, we WERE going to the picnic, but I fucked up, disowned my brother for no reason and told my whole family to go fuck themselves in a violent display of temper because I have no self control and can't stand being caught in a lie."
Ah well. Supposedly the whole world is going to end in 6 months anyway, or was that today? I don't really recall how that whole end of the world theory works, but I think it's a truckload of rubbish. There's no reason whatsoever to think the world isn't going to keep on being just as fucked up as it is now, for a good long time yet. So don't go maxing out your credit cards just yet!
Now, I have to go take some tylenol just to ease the pain enough to sleep tonight. Too much work on a neck injury does it little good, not to mention the sudden leg injury i got yesterday. Getting old sucks! I don't recommend it. One star out of ten, just for the wisdom you get as you grow older, assuming you don't lose your brains to alzheimers. I would not get old again if I could help it.
And no, it's nothing serious. A few days of rest and I'll be good as new. Happy Memorial Day!
Saturday, May 26, 2012
The Hulk's Other Life
Did you ever wonder what life would be like for Bruce Banner if he never got angry?
For those not in the know about comic book lore, Bruce Banner is the Incredible Hulk's alter ego. His arch-nemesis, if you think about it, because Bruce is the one being that the hulk cannot ever smash, the one being that can control the hulk and make him do what he wants, and the hulk can't do shit about it because Bruce Banner IS the Hulk. If you've ever followed the comic books at all, on the rare occasions when Bruce and the Hulk are somehow separated from each other (which has happened on occasion) or the Hulk refers to him, the Hulk hates Bruce with a passion, and will go after him above all others.
So let's say you are Bruce Banner. You know what happens when you get angry. Things break, people get hurt. At the very least, there's extensive property damage. So you try and avoid being angry. You stay out of sight, you work in a lab by yourself, you tell people, very politely, things like "Please don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I am angry." And you mean it.
Yet, here's the problem. People always seem to want to make you angry. What's up with that? if you've ever followed the comic or watched any of the various cartoons or movies, you know that Bruce Banner is somehow, some way, going to be made angry. Usually little things don't do it. I mean, Bruce doesn't fly into a rage and become the hulk when he breaks a nail, you know? He's very mild-mannered. We're talking Clark Kent, here. So somebody really has to keep pushing bruce's buttons over and over before they rile him up enough. And then, they pay for it. So why do they do it? Just for the lulz?
So what would Bruce's life be like if no one ever made him angry? Or if they listened to him when he said things like "Please don't make me angry?"
I can picture him laying out a beach somewhere, soaking up some rays with old Betty Ross (i think that was her name) while their kids play in the surf (because I think that shit in the movies about him not being able to have sex is just BS, that it's just a pulse thing... in the comics it was only anger that triggered the hulk, not passion). He'd live out his days in peace and quiet, and sure if something bad happened to him like a mugging or something, he'd just hand them his wallet and they'd take the money and run off. They wouldn't beat him up just because they felt like it, and trigger one of his rages that ends with all of them looking like roadkill.
The reason I mention this is because it seems like people just like making me angry some days. And I'm not someone who gets angry easily. I chat on the internet, people say things to me all the time, impugn my good nature, but do i care? Nah. I understand they are just doing it because they are jealous of how great I am. I get that. I don't counter attack them. I just nod and smile, because I know deep inside the other person, there's a scared little girl who doesn't know how to handle such an obviously superior being such as myself. But it's okay! They'll hang around me and eventually learn to worship me as they should, and if they don't learn that right away, that's okay too! Some people are slower than others. Everyone has their own pace of learning, and if they never learn to impale themselves on the altar of my love, well, that's just their loss!
So I'm helping mom get ready for the picnic tomorrow. And she's saying things like "Can you run downstairs and check to see if we have any mustard?" and "Count all the soda cans we have and let me know how many of each so I know what I have to buy at the store." and "Check the dates on all the salad dressings we have in the fridge and let me know which ones are expired. And while you're there, see if you can find the pickles." and "Don't let me forget to bring propane tomorrow." and "Unload the groceries, will you? I need a drink." Finally after doing all that, she comes to something I don't want to do. Can't remember if it was grilling the food tomorrow (I burned the burgers last time) or driving her somewhere on monday (I'm going to be worn out the day after the picnic) and I tell her no, I'd rather not. And she responds with...
"Why not? It's not like you ever do anything around here."
At which point, my brain asploded. Who needs gamma radiation when you have a mom?
Even worse, she added "If you weren't so lazy, none of this would have happened." referring to my brother's accusation that he was just trying to get me to do more around the house, and that's why he's disowning me (check my previous posts if you are lost about that one). She wouldn't even discuss it, either, I was all like "tell me you didn't just say that." and she was already changing the subject. So I got mad and just turned around and walked away, and THEN she's all apologetic. Like getting me pissed off is her only goal in life. And once I am mad, she's happy. The minute I stop being angry and stressed, she starts pestering me again. Wtf is up with people like that? Are they put on this earth just to turn Bruce Banner into the Hulk? That is their life's destiny?
I guess someone has to be the Hulk's roadkill.
For those not in the know about comic book lore, Bruce Banner is the Incredible Hulk's alter ego. His arch-nemesis, if you think about it, because Bruce is the one being that the hulk cannot ever smash, the one being that can control the hulk and make him do what he wants, and the hulk can't do shit about it because Bruce Banner IS the Hulk. If you've ever followed the comic books at all, on the rare occasions when Bruce and the Hulk are somehow separated from each other (which has happened on occasion) or the Hulk refers to him, the Hulk hates Bruce with a passion, and will go after him above all others.
So let's say you are Bruce Banner. You know what happens when you get angry. Things break, people get hurt. At the very least, there's extensive property damage. So you try and avoid being angry. You stay out of sight, you work in a lab by yourself, you tell people, very politely, things like "Please don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I am angry." And you mean it.
Yet, here's the problem. People always seem to want to make you angry. What's up with that? if you've ever followed the comic or watched any of the various cartoons or movies, you know that Bruce Banner is somehow, some way, going to be made angry. Usually little things don't do it. I mean, Bruce doesn't fly into a rage and become the hulk when he breaks a nail, you know? He's very mild-mannered. We're talking Clark Kent, here. So somebody really has to keep pushing bruce's buttons over and over before they rile him up enough. And then, they pay for it. So why do they do it? Just for the lulz?
So what would Bruce's life be like if no one ever made him angry? Or if they listened to him when he said things like "Please don't make me angry?"
I can picture him laying out a beach somewhere, soaking up some rays with old Betty Ross (i think that was her name) while their kids play in the surf (because I think that shit in the movies about him not being able to have sex is just BS, that it's just a pulse thing... in the comics it was only anger that triggered the hulk, not passion). He'd live out his days in peace and quiet, and sure if something bad happened to him like a mugging or something, he'd just hand them his wallet and they'd take the money and run off. They wouldn't beat him up just because they felt like it, and trigger one of his rages that ends with all of them looking like roadkill.
The reason I mention this is because it seems like people just like making me angry some days. And I'm not someone who gets angry easily. I chat on the internet, people say things to me all the time, impugn my good nature, but do i care? Nah. I understand they are just doing it because they are jealous of how great I am. I get that. I don't counter attack them. I just nod and smile, because I know deep inside the other person, there's a scared little girl who doesn't know how to handle such an obviously superior being such as myself. But it's okay! They'll hang around me and eventually learn to worship me as they should, and if they don't learn that right away, that's okay too! Some people are slower than others. Everyone has their own pace of learning, and if they never learn to impale themselves on the altar of my love, well, that's just their loss!
So I'm helping mom get ready for the picnic tomorrow. And she's saying things like "Can you run downstairs and check to see if we have any mustard?" and "Count all the soda cans we have and let me know how many of each so I know what I have to buy at the store." and "Check the dates on all the salad dressings we have in the fridge and let me know which ones are expired. And while you're there, see if you can find the pickles." and "Don't let me forget to bring propane tomorrow." and "Unload the groceries, will you? I need a drink." Finally after doing all that, she comes to something I don't want to do. Can't remember if it was grilling the food tomorrow (I burned the burgers last time) or driving her somewhere on monday (I'm going to be worn out the day after the picnic) and I tell her no, I'd rather not. And she responds with...
"Why not? It's not like you ever do anything around here."
At which point, my brain asploded. Who needs gamma radiation when you have a mom?
Even worse, she added "If you weren't so lazy, none of this would have happened." referring to my brother's accusation that he was just trying to get me to do more around the house, and that's why he's disowning me (check my previous posts if you are lost about that one). She wouldn't even discuss it, either, I was all like "tell me you didn't just say that." and she was already changing the subject. So I got mad and just turned around and walked away, and THEN she's all apologetic. Like getting me pissed off is her only goal in life. And once I am mad, she's happy. The minute I stop being angry and stressed, she starts pestering me again. Wtf is up with people like that? Are they put on this earth just to turn Bruce Banner into the Hulk? That is their life's destiny?
I guess someone has to be the Hulk's roadkill.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Family Drama Update
Ah, there's nothing like warm family gatherings by the fire.
So I'm in my room last night, playing computer games like I always do (I'm a bit of a gaming geek), and my brother shows up. Now, as I mentioned a few posts back, my brother told me he was disowning me one fine fall day in the middle of my kitchen because I wouldn't take his side in his 14-year feud with one of my sisters. He basically gave me a choice, either I join his side and disown my sister, or he was disowning me. I told him goodbye, since their argument that happened 14 years back didn't have anything to do with me, I wasn't there for it, and I've never wanted to discuss it with either of them. But, my brother didn't give me a choice. According to my nephew (his son), he's been ranting and raving about that argument for years, and wishing my sister dead. I had been trying to ignore him for 14 years and apparently, he got tired of being ignored. He did all this while my mother was in the hospital undergoing heart surgery (his mother too). But instead of coming over to talk about mom's condition, or to see if I needed anything or just to commiserate over mom's poor health at the time (she's doing great now, by the way), he came over, ranted about my sister for about an hour (my sister was on the phone at the time and heard part of it), and then told me he wanted nothing more to do with me unless I had nothing more to do with her.
I really hate ultimatums.
So anyway, he comes to my house last night, and stands at my bedroom door. He asks "Do you have something you want to say to me?" And I'm wondering what the hell there could be to talk about at this point, so I say "No?" And he says "I heard you weren't coming to the picnic unless I apologized to you." I'd never said that to anyone. I just didn't want to be around such a unpredictable person who'd had a history of violence against me. As of yesterday morning, I was planning on attending the picnic and just trying to steer clear of him. And note, that wasn't an apology. He was just relating what he'd heard (from my mother, who somehow got that into her head, who told my sister "The tattler," who told his wife, who told him). So I said "No?" I was hoping that would be the end of it. But it's never that easy with him. He then said "So we're good?" And of course we aren't, so at this point, I have to ruin his good mood. I say "No." for the third time, and ask him if he's still disowning me. He says "Yes." point blank, no qualifications. So I said "Then there's nothing more to discuss." So he's all "Why not? Is it because of that thing that happened in the kitchen? All that I said was, Mom's coming home from the hospital and you need to do more around the house, and you said no." Which is total bullshit. Despite Mom actually being in the hospital that one fine day last fall, he never even mentioned Mom from the time he walked through the door until the time he left, which certainly doesn't sound to me like someone who is concerned about her health. Also, that's pointedly ridiculous. I've been here helping Mom (and my deceased dad) out for the last 21 years by myself, through all their various illnesses and cancer, doing a hell of a lot more than he's ever done. Certainly she was going to need more help around the house, and I wouldn't have even considered not helping her out until she was better. The poor woman simply didn't have anyone else to keep an eye on her while she was recovering from the surgery. And another also, if that's all he'd said, why was he disowning me, then? That makes no sense. So I say "I'm not getting into it with you." Because I know he's just going to keep repeating his insane lies until someone buys them. To which, he looks over at my mom (who I presume was standing in the kitchen, though I couldn't tell through the wall) and makes a face like SEE? like this somehow proves his point.
I think you, gentle reader, are getting a sense of just what a dick he is.
So he tries to get into it with me again, and I refuse to take his bait. He again repeats "his version" of what happened in the kitchen that day, to mom, right outside my door so I can hear him lying. So I refuse to get into it with him, and he starts just shouting at me, saying things like "You want respect? Well, I give what I get!" I don't recall ever mentioning the word respect around him, but I assume at this point he's just totally bonkers, and then after a while of him ranting I ask him "Well, if that's how you feel, why are you still here? Just go." So he blows up, says fuck this, and fuck that, fuck everyone and slams my door so hard that he breaks the trim. And then has to hammer it back on before he can stalk out of the house. lol He yelled at my poor mom in the kitchen for a while, telling her he was done with everyone and I can go fuck myself and all that, and then tells her he's not coming to the picnic, coming for the holidays, or ever coming over here again. Which, at least solves the problem of him possibly blowing up at me again for not agreeing wholeheartedly to his lies. (shrugs)
He did a crappy job on the trim, by the way. I had to take the hammer and fix it myself after he left.
The funny thing about all this is that my mom defends him all the time. She's all like "well, he's been working too hard" and "he's in a lot of pain" and "He doesn't want to be alone." All i can think of is, well if he doesn't want to be alone then why is he disowning me? Her defenses of him make absolutely no sense either. She'll say something to try and justify his completely unjustifiable actions, and I'll ask her if that's why, then why did he do this? And she has absolutely no idea. lol Finally she said to me today, "Maybe he's just having a nervous breakdown." To which I said "Well, I just hope he doesn't take all of us down with him."
So thankfully that drama is now out of the way. If he wants a physical confrontation (he has a past history of pushing it that far), then he's going to have to come right to my door and start it, because I am not even getting near him if I have a choice. But as long as he has nothing more to do with me, he won't be around and I can get some peace and quiet around here, so I can work on my tan.
And yes, if he starts a fistfight with me, I am kicking his ass. No question. Hulk smash. :-)
So I'm in my room last night, playing computer games like I always do (I'm a bit of a gaming geek), and my brother shows up. Now, as I mentioned a few posts back, my brother told me he was disowning me one fine fall day in the middle of my kitchen because I wouldn't take his side in his 14-year feud with one of my sisters. He basically gave me a choice, either I join his side and disown my sister, or he was disowning me. I told him goodbye, since their argument that happened 14 years back didn't have anything to do with me, I wasn't there for it, and I've never wanted to discuss it with either of them. But, my brother didn't give me a choice. According to my nephew (his son), he's been ranting and raving about that argument for years, and wishing my sister dead. I had been trying to ignore him for 14 years and apparently, he got tired of being ignored. He did all this while my mother was in the hospital undergoing heart surgery (his mother too). But instead of coming over to talk about mom's condition, or to see if I needed anything or just to commiserate over mom's poor health at the time (she's doing great now, by the way), he came over, ranted about my sister for about an hour (my sister was on the phone at the time and heard part of it), and then told me he wanted nothing more to do with me unless I had nothing more to do with her.
I really hate ultimatums.
So anyway, he comes to my house last night, and stands at my bedroom door. He asks "Do you have something you want to say to me?" And I'm wondering what the hell there could be to talk about at this point, so I say "No?" And he says "I heard you weren't coming to the picnic unless I apologized to you." I'd never said that to anyone. I just didn't want to be around such a unpredictable person who'd had a history of violence against me. As of yesterday morning, I was planning on attending the picnic and just trying to steer clear of him. And note, that wasn't an apology. He was just relating what he'd heard (from my mother, who somehow got that into her head, who told my sister "The tattler," who told his wife, who told him). So I said "No?" I was hoping that would be the end of it. But it's never that easy with him. He then said "So we're good?" And of course we aren't, so at this point, I have to ruin his good mood. I say "No." for the third time, and ask him if he's still disowning me. He says "Yes." point blank, no qualifications. So I said "Then there's nothing more to discuss." So he's all "Why not? Is it because of that thing that happened in the kitchen? All that I said was, Mom's coming home from the hospital and you need to do more around the house, and you said no." Which is total bullshit. Despite Mom actually being in the hospital that one fine day last fall, he never even mentioned Mom from the time he walked through the door until the time he left, which certainly doesn't sound to me like someone who is concerned about her health. Also, that's pointedly ridiculous. I've been here helping Mom (and my deceased dad) out for the last 21 years by myself, through all their various illnesses and cancer, doing a hell of a lot more than he's ever done. Certainly she was going to need more help around the house, and I wouldn't have even considered not helping her out until she was better. The poor woman simply didn't have anyone else to keep an eye on her while she was recovering from the surgery. And another also, if that's all he'd said, why was he disowning me, then? That makes no sense. So I say "I'm not getting into it with you." Because I know he's just going to keep repeating his insane lies until someone buys them. To which, he looks over at my mom (who I presume was standing in the kitchen, though I couldn't tell through the wall) and makes a face like SEE? like this somehow proves his point.
I think you, gentle reader, are getting a sense of just what a dick he is.
So he tries to get into it with me again, and I refuse to take his bait. He again repeats "his version" of what happened in the kitchen that day, to mom, right outside my door so I can hear him lying. So I refuse to get into it with him, and he starts just shouting at me, saying things like "You want respect? Well, I give what I get!" I don't recall ever mentioning the word respect around him, but I assume at this point he's just totally bonkers, and then after a while of him ranting I ask him "Well, if that's how you feel, why are you still here? Just go." So he blows up, says fuck this, and fuck that, fuck everyone and slams my door so hard that he breaks the trim. And then has to hammer it back on before he can stalk out of the house. lol He yelled at my poor mom in the kitchen for a while, telling her he was done with everyone and I can go fuck myself and all that, and then tells her he's not coming to the picnic, coming for the holidays, or ever coming over here again. Which, at least solves the problem of him possibly blowing up at me again for not agreeing wholeheartedly to his lies. (shrugs)
He did a crappy job on the trim, by the way. I had to take the hammer and fix it myself after he left.
The funny thing about all this is that my mom defends him all the time. She's all like "well, he's been working too hard" and "he's in a lot of pain" and "He doesn't want to be alone." All i can think of is, well if he doesn't want to be alone then why is he disowning me? Her defenses of him make absolutely no sense either. She'll say something to try and justify his completely unjustifiable actions, and I'll ask her if that's why, then why did he do this? And she has absolutely no idea. lol Finally she said to me today, "Maybe he's just having a nervous breakdown." To which I said "Well, I just hope he doesn't take all of us down with him."
So thankfully that drama is now out of the way. If he wants a physical confrontation (he has a past history of pushing it that far), then he's going to have to come right to my door and start it, because I am not even getting near him if I have a choice. But as long as he has nothing more to do with me, he won't be around and I can get some peace and quiet around here, so I can work on my tan.
And yes, if he starts a fistfight with me, I am kicking his ass. No question. Hulk smash. :-)
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
The Host - Review
I love creature features.
There's really no other way to say it. There's nothing like a big crazy monster stomping around eating humans and the humans fighting it. Godzilla, Rodan, King Kong, Mothra, all those wacky movies are just things I love to watch. It's not only an enjoyment of the imaginative movies themselves, but my training in biology and anthropology that makes me wonder, could such things exist? What would their society be like if there was more than one of them? How would their existence affect the ecology of the region they live in? But that's all scientific stuff. Most of that doesn't really apply in monster movies, but that's just why i find them so interesting.
So it's no surprise my Netflix queue is filled with them. yesterday evening I picked one at random, The Host. Turned out to be a very decent korean or vietnamese (forgive my ignorance about what country of origin this movie emerged from, I'm an american, so I claim american ignorance of the world around me as my excuse) flick. Movie quality was excellent and it appeared to be a big-budget production.
Let me set this up for you. A medical lab wants to get rid of some formaldehyde. This is a toxic preservative. The guy in charge of the lab (an american) orders his asian (again, forgive my ignorance of the man's origins, I mean no disrespect) employee to just dump the contents of some bottles down the water drain, which will pollute the nearby Han river. At least, I think it was the Han river. I suppose if I weren't such a lazy git, I could look up the Han river and find out what country it's in, but honestly, it doesn't really have much effect on the story. It could just as easily have been the mississippi. At first I thought it was just a few bottles, but as the camera rolls sideways, you seen an extravagantly long table just FILLED with the empty bottles that have already been dumped. And so the story begins. In very short progression, we see a bunch of little scenes spread out over a few years, in which the creature is first seen as a small tadpole, then a larger shadow beneath the waters, and so on, up til we get to the now of the story, when it's the size of a bus, and much more mobile.
I'm going to draw some parallels here. Godzilla in japan was born of radiation. This beast was born of toxic chemicals polluting a large river. In both cases, americans were or are shown to be the root cause. Of course in japan's case, the distinction is never mentioned like in this movie, only inferred. The dropping of atomic weapons on japan during ww2 being the likely genesis of Godzilla is never directly referred to in the godzilla movies, but it's like the 800 pound gorilla in the room. You know how it got there. You don't need to be told. Mentioning it would only make people uncomfortable. Yet there it is. in The Host, the very beginning of the movie makes it clear... Us damn americans have no respect for anything. Or at least, some of us don't, according to this movie. Sometimes I wonder why we don't have our own monster movies here, blaming gigantic monsters that destroy cleveland on the chernobyl incident, but we don't. Not sure why. Might be fun to make one, but eh. On to the review.
So the Host, in this movie, refers to the large fishy/tadpole-y critter that takes up residence in the river and begins eating people. At least, I think it does. Most of the movie is actually not about the fish-monster. It's actually about this poor slob of a guy who works for his father in a food stand near the river. He seems to have narcolepsy, and even when he's awake he's not too sharp. He has a daughter, a sister, and a brother, although only his father and his daughter live with him in the food shack, which is owned by his father, the girl's grand-dad. The man, named Gung-du, if I am not mistaken, is going about his usual day's work in his usual sloppy manner when the creature first makes it way out of the river. Chaos ensues, and Gung-du's entire family is quickly pulled into the tale.
That's all I am giving away. I'm going to say a few more things but hopefully, I can disguise my comments in such a way that you won't know anything about the plot unless you've already seen the movie. The creature is featured often, of course. I wouldn't give this movie a review unless the creature was quite prominent, but it's almost a sideline to the family drama that goes on. Almost reminds me, again, of the old godzilla movies, where there's a lot of drama occurring along the sidelines caused by the beast's rampages, and often the drama among the people is more important to the end of the tale than what the monster does.
Gung-du and his family have some problems, that much is readily apparent. They are pretty normal, and therefore pretty dysfunctional, and yet they all try and band together to survive the crisis. Gung-du's transformation alone is worth watching the movie for. At the moment, he seems more of a hero to me than the much more popular Harry Potter (who's movie series finale I reviewed a few posts ago). The ending of The Host was pretty spectacular, but one thing seems to stand out in my mind, and that's... why nobody tried to do CPR? Makes no sense, but I guess the movie had to turn out that way, and if you see it, you'll know what I mean.
Good movie. I'd watch it again. Wish the ending was a bit different, but still not too shabby. Two hours long, so watch it when you have a good chunk of time to spare. Certainly not a B-movie. This looks like it was done in hollywood, but I know it wasn't. Creature effects are better than most of the stuff I saw in avatar, so fuck you, James Cameron. lol No nudity, no martial arts, no laser guns, this is all about a creature popping up in an urban environment and what happens thereafter. As a result, this is probably one of the most realistic monster movies that I have seen. The monster's origins may be a bit silly to my way of thinking, but that doesn't really have an impact on how realistically the rest of the tale is told. I guess you have to have an excuse to have a monster, and formaldehyde is as good as any.
The Host, on Netflix at the moment.
There's really no other way to say it. There's nothing like a big crazy monster stomping around eating humans and the humans fighting it. Godzilla, Rodan, King Kong, Mothra, all those wacky movies are just things I love to watch. It's not only an enjoyment of the imaginative movies themselves, but my training in biology and anthropology that makes me wonder, could such things exist? What would their society be like if there was more than one of them? How would their existence affect the ecology of the region they live in? But that's all scientific stuff. Most of that doesn't really apply in monster movies, but that's just why i find them so interesting.
So it's no surprise my Netflix queue is filled with them. yesterday evening I picked one at random, The Host. Turned out to be a very decent korean or vietnamese (forgive my ignorance about what country of origin this movie emerged from, I'm an american, so I claim american ignorance of the world around me as my excuse) flick. Movie quality was excellent and it appeared to be a big-budget production.
Let me set this up for you. A medical lab wants to get rid of some formaldehyde. This is a toxic preservative. The guy in charge of the lab (an american) orders his asian (again, forgive my ignorance of the man's origins, I mean no disrespect) employee to just dump the contents of some bottles down the water drain, which will pollute the nearby Han river. At least, I think it was the Han river. I suppose if I weren't such a lazy git, I could look up the Han river and find out what country it's in, but honestly, it doesn't really have much effect on the story. It could just as easily have been the mississippi. At first I thought it was just a few bottles, but as the camera rolls sideways, you seen an extravagantly long table just FILLED with the empty bottles that have already been dumped. And so the story begins. In very short progression, we see a bunch of little scenes spread out over a few years, in which the creature is first seen as a small tadpole, then a larger shadow beneath the waters, and so on, up til we get to the now of the story, when it's the size of a bus, and much more mobile.
I'm going to draw some parallels here. Godzilla in japan was born of radiation. This beast was born of toxic chemicals polluting a large river. In both cases, americans were or are shown to be the root cause. Of course in japan's case, the distinction is never mentioned like in this movie, only inferred. The dropping of atomic weapons on japan during ww2 being the likely genesis of Godzilla is never directly referred to in the godzilla movies, but it's like the 800 pound gorilla in the room. You know how it got there. You don't need to be told. Mentioning it would only make people uncomfortable. Yet there it is. in The Host, the very beginning of the movie makes it clear... Us damn americans have no respect for anything. Or at least, some of us don't, according to this movie. Sometimes I wonder why we don't have our own monster movies here, blaming gigantic monsters that destroy cleveland on the chernobyl incident, but we don't. Not sure why. Might be fun to make one, but eh. On to the review.
So the Host, in this movie, refers to the large fishy/tadpole-y critter that takes up residence in the river and begins eating people. At least, I think it does. Most of the movie is actually not about the fish-monster. It's actually about this poor slob of a guy who works for his father in a food stand near the river. He seems to have narcolepsy, and even when he's awake he's not too sharp. He has a daughter, a sister, and a brother, although only his father and his daughter live with him in the food shack, which is owned by his father, the girl's grand-dad. The man, named Gung-du, if I am not mistaken, is going about his usual day's work in his usual sloppy manner when the creature first makes it way out of the river. Chaos ensues, and Gung-du's entire family is quickly pulled into the tale.
That's all I am giving away. I'm going to say a few more things but hopefully, I can disguise my comments in such a way that you won't know anything about the plot unless you've already seen the movie. The creature is featured often, of course. I wouldn't give this movie a review unless the creature was quite prominent, but it's almost a sideline to the family drama that goes on. Almost reminds me, again, of the old godzilla movies, where there's a lot of drama occurring along the sidelines caused by the beast's rampages, and often the drama among the people is more important to the end of the tale than what the monster does.
Gung-du and his family have some problems, that much is readily apparent. They are pretty normal, and therefore pretty dysfunctional, and yet they all try and band together to survive the crisis. Gung-du's transformation alone is worth watching the movie for. At the moment, he seems more of a hero to me than the much more popular Harry Potter (who's movie series finale I reviewed a few posts ago). The ending of The Host was pretty spectacular, but one thing seems to stand out in my mind, and that's... why nobody tried to do CPR? Makes no sense, but I guess the movie had to turn out that way, and if you see it, you'll know what I mean.
Good movie. I'd watch it again. Wish the ending was a bit different, but still not too shabby. Two hours long, so watch it when you have a good chunk of time to spare. Certainly not a B-movie. This looks like it was done in hollywood, but I know it wasn't. Creature effects are better than most of the stuff I saw in avatar, so fuck you, James Cameron. lol No nudity, no martial arts, no laser guns, this is all about a creature popping up in an urban environment and what happens thereafter. As a result, this is probably one of the most realistic monster movies that I have seen. The monster's origins may be a bit silly to my way of thinking, but that doesn't really have an impact on how realistically the rest of the tale is told. I guess you have to have an excuse to have a monster, and formaldehyde is as good as any.
The Host, on Netflix at the moment.
Monday, May 21, 2012
House Series Finale
I've been watching House since about 2005 or 2006 or so.
It's a show about an asshole doctor who is really good at solving medical problems. There's some other doctors there, supposedly he works at a teaching hospital, but honestly, they shouldn't be learning from him. You can't learn smarts. House is a genius, so his ability to solve problems is inherent. Other doctors may be good doctors, but it's inherently impossible for House to teach them to be geniuses because they don't already have it in them. And if they do, then he doesn't have anything to teach them, because he's a bad teacher. He's not trying to teach them to be better doctors, he's trying to teach them to be geniuses, to solve problems like he can, and they can't. Simply because they are not like him. Which characters have reminded him of throughout the entire series. Sure, everyone has their moments, and maybe the doctors have learned to reach for solutions to problems instead of just giving up, but they should already know that.
So the show's been on 8 years. He's basically solved just about every medical problem he's been presented with. He's had numerous brushes with dead. Saved his friend's lives countless times. And besides all that, he's a basket case. He's mentally unstable, he's an ex-convict, he's undergoing psychiatric counseling, he's a drug addict, he hallucinates. He's an abrasive, mean, cruel asshole who thinks everyone lies and is a general misanthrope. And you forgive him all that because he saves people's lives.
I suppose in a way, House is every doctor. They are elitist pricks who try to shove pills down your throat and ignore your opinions about your own body because they think they know better. And you tolerate them because supposedly, they save people's lives. Honestly, it makes me wonder what the numbers are. Do they save more people that they kill? Did House? You just never know.
I wasn't liking the series finale. I honestly thought they should fast forward 5 months to house getting out of jail, show wilson dying, and having house be there at the end. I think they even alluded to that in last week's episode. Wilson is house's best friend, by the way, played by robert sean leonard, I think his name is. We learned several episodes ago that wilson has inoperable cancer and will die in about 5 or 6 months. I only know who he is because he was in "My best friend is a vampire." which was an excellent movie that came out many years back. okay, maybe it wasn't an excellent movie, but having seen thousands of monster movies and disliking vampires as much as I do, I liked that vampire movie, so that says a lot. Anyway, I wasn't liking the series finale because they were spending way too much time doing flashbacks to what supposedly happened before the series start. I really don't like flashbacks. And then House was hallucinating through half the episode, which I don't like either. I know technically they are only supposed to be his own thoughts talking back to him, but anyone's who's watched the show knows his own mind plays tricks on him sometimes so you just never know whether what you are watching is real or not, and I hate that about movies and TV shows. There's nothing more annoying than getting to the end of a long movie or a long series and having them go "and it was all just in his head, none of that actually ever happened." Totally blows. plus, with all the flashbacks, it was hard to tell what was happening in the now, and then what happened back then, and what was the future, it was just all over the place.
Of course, they did pull a fast one on me there. The show's going along and I figure out the ending. Then they show something and I think "oh, ok, maybe I was wrong." I have been wrong before, it happens. I am not afraid to admit it. Only this time, I wasn't. Spoilers...
House dies at the end. In a fire in a collapsing building. When it was collapsing, I knew he wasn't going to be dead. I knew that wasn't how they would end it. And when they pulled a covered body out a building without showing house's face, i was pretty sure. And then the medical examiner confirmed it was his body, which threw me off. So then everyone is at House's funeral and Wilson gets a text from house telling him to shut up. Turns out house made it out of the back of the burning building and now has plenty of free time to hang out with wilson during his last 5 months of life. In case you don't know, house was going back to jail for public vandalism or something because he was on parole and violated his parole and had to finish out his sentence, which meant he'd miss wilson's last 5 months of life. They'd been friends for 20 years, so that would have just sucked.
So House fakes his own death, and he and wilson take off on a motorcycle tour of the country. And house, during all the hallucinating he was going through in the burning building (probably while high on heroin, I'm guessing) decides to change and become a better person. So pretty much in the last few minutes of the series, they save House's life (wilson's pretty much a goner, so there's no hope for him) but he gets to start over completely. I don't know if he'd go back to his old life after wilson's death or just pick up as a doctor somewhere else, and they never show that, so we have no way of knowing, but House's decision to be a better person is supposedly all he really needed. I assume from the little bits and pieces that they show that he'll eventually return to his old life after wilson goes.
End spoilers. This show was a departure for me. I don't typically like medical dramas. Not since Quincy, ME, back in the 70's, anyway. It's funny, my mom was watching this old game show on the game show network last week, they had Jack Klugman as one of the celebrities and the solution the normal folks were trying to solve for big cash prizes was "Quincy ME." Jack klugman, in case you don't know, starred in Quincy ME, and none of the normal folk could guess the solution, despite Jack Klugman knowing it, which was hilarious. At the end of the puzzle he had to correctly guess his own show's name just to win the money for the contestant. I laughed. HE turned to the show's host and said "And you wonder why i say I'll be in the unemployment line." Funny jack! So true if they couldn't even remember the name of his show while he was the celebrity guest. Too funny. But anyway, I only started watching House because one of my ex-bosses suggested it.
The show started in 2004, when I started work at my last job, and I have been out of work just over a year now, and the show is over. I guess the ends of all these series and their finales, like the House finale, is a suggestion that maybe I am on the cusp of a new stage in my life, like House is. I'd certainly like to think so. It's not so much the last stages weren't so great, because pretty much all I've ever done was have fun (and I'm going to continue to do so), but maybe I can have fun in different ways now. Less poor ways. lol I once took a questionnaire to determine how in touch I was with my "inner child" as they used to call it. Turns out, I AM my inner child. We are one. I may be 42, but I continue to look at every day as a new adventure, and i don't care if i live to be 142 (or more) but I'll still enjoy having as much fun in every day as possible. Some days, that may not be a ton of fun (like when i actually have a job to go to), but there's always another day to have fun! Until there isn't, of course.
In preparation for that possibility, I've told my nephews to put on my tombstone as my famous last words: "Relax! I got this!" Always leave them laughing, I think Leslie Neilsen said. That's assuming I don't outlive my nephews. I've done so much stupid shit in my life that I think my nephews could laugh about it for a thousand years. And since I'm not dead yet, there's more coming! Oh, the hilarity!
As an aside, there was a House retrospective done by Hugh Laurie (who plays House) before the series finale. I knew he was english, but I was completely surprised by how his voice was accented when he wasn't playing House. He didn't sound anything like him. I'm not sure how that's possible, but I guess that's why it surprised me. The clipped english didn't even remotely remind me of House's speech patterns, which I guess means Hugh Laurie is a hell of an actor. Props, Hugh! Well done on the american accent.
It's a show about an asshole doctor who is really good at solving medical problems. There's some other doctors there, supposedly he works at a teaching hospital, but honestly, they shouldn't be learning from him. You can't learn smarts. House is a genius, so his ability to solve problems is inherent. Other doctors may be good doctors, but it's inherently impossible for House to teach them to be geniuses because they don't already have it in them. And if they do, then he doesn't have anything to teach them, because he's a bad teacher. He's not trying to teach them to be better doctors, he's trying to teach them to be geniuses, to solve problems like he can, and they can't. Simply because they are not like him. Which characters have reminded him of throughout the entire series. Sure, everyone has their moments, and maybe the doctors have learned to reach for solutions to problems instead of just giving up, but they should already know that.
So the show's been on 8 years. He's basically solved just about every medical problem he's been presented with. He's had numerous brushes with dead. Saved his friend's lives countless times. And besides all that, he's a basket case. He's mentally unstable, he's an ex-convict, he's undergoing psychiatric counseling, he's a drug addict, he hallucinates. He's an abrasive, mean, cruel asshole who thinks everyone lies and is a general misanthrope. And you forgive him all that because he saves people's lives.
I suppose in a way, House is every doctor. They are elitist pricks who try to shove pills down your throat and ignore your opinions about your own body because they think they know better. And you tolerate them because supposedly, they save people's lives. Honestly, it makes me wonder what the numbers are. Do they save more people that they kill? Did House? You just never know.
I wasn't liking the series finale. I honestly thought they should fast forward 5 months to house getting out of jail, show wilson dying, and having house be there at the end. I think they even alluded to that in last week's episode. Wilson is house's best friend, by the way, played by robert sean leonard, I think his name is. We learned several episodes ago that wilson has inoperable cancer and will die in about 5 or 6 months. I only know who he is because he was in "My best friend is a vampire." which was an excellent movie that came out many years back. okay, maybe it wasn't an excellent movie, but having seen thousands of monster movies and disliking vampires as much as I do, I liked that vampire movie, so that says a lot. Anyway, I wasn't liking the series finale because they were spending way too much time doing flashbacks to what supposedly happened before the series start. I really don't like flashbacks. And then House was hallucinating through half the episode, which I don't like either. I know technically they are only supposed to be his own thoughts talking back to him, but anyone's who's watched the show knows his own mind plays tricks on him sometimes so you just never know whether what you are watching is real or not, and I hate that about movies and TV shows. There's nothing more annoying than getting to the end of a long movie or a long series and having them go "and it was all just in his head, none of that actually ever happened." Totally blows. plus, with all the flashbacks, it was hard to tell what was happening in the now, and then what happened back then, and what was the future, it was just all over the place.
Of course, they did pull a fast one on me there. The show's going along and I figure out the ending. Then they show something and I think "oh, ok, maybe I was wrong." I have been wrong before, it happens. I am not afraid to admit it. Only this time, I wasn't. Spoilers...
House dies at the end. In a fire in a collapsing building. When it was collapsing, I knew he wasn't going to be dead. I knew that wasn't how they would end it. And when they pulled a covered body out a building without showing house's face, i was pretty sure. And then the medical examiner confirmed it was his body, which threw me off. So then everyone is at House's funeral and Wilson gets a text from house telling him to shut up. Turns out house made it out of the back of the burning building and now has plenty of free time to hang out with wilson during his last 5 months of life. In case you don't know, house was going back to jail for public vandalism or something because he was on parole and violated his parole and had to finish out his sentence, which meant he'd miss wilson's last 5 months of life. They'd been friends for 20 years, so that would have just sucked.
So House fakes his own death, and he and wilson take off on a motorcycle tour of the country. And house, during all the hallucinating he was going through in the burning building (probably while high on heroin, I'm guessing) decides to change and become a better person. So pretty much in the last few minutes of the series, they save House's life (wilson's pretty much a goner, so there's no hope for him) but he gets to start over completely. I don't know if he'd go back to his old life after wilson's death or just pick up as a doctor somewhere else, and they never show that, so we have no way of knowing, but House's decision to be a better person is supposedly all he really needed. I assume from the little bits and pieces that they show that he'll eventually return to his old life after wilson goes.
End spoilers. This show was a departure for me. I don't typically like medical dramas. Not since Quincy, ME, back in the 70's, anyway. It's funny, my mom was watching this old game show on the game show network last week, they had Jack Klugman as one of the celebrities and the solution the normal folks were trying to solve for big cash prizes was "Quincy ME." Jack klugman, in case you don't know, starred in Quincy ME, and none of the normal folk could guess the solution, despite Jack Klugman knowing it, which was hilarious. At the end of the puzzle he had to correctly guess his own show's name just to win the money for the contestant. I laughed. HE turned to the show's host and said "And you wonder why i say I'll be in the unemployment line." Funny jack! So true if they couldn't even remember the name of his show while he was the celebrity guest. Too funny. But anyway, I only started watching House because one of my ex-bosses suggested it.
The show started in 2004, when I started work at my last job, and I have been out of work just over a year now, and the show is over. I guess the ends of all these series and their finales, like the House finale, is a suggestion that maybe I am on the cusp of a new stage in my life, like House is. I'd certainly like to think so. It's not so much the last stages weren't so great, because pretty much all I've ever done was have fun (and I'm going to continue to do so), but maybe I can have fun in different ways now. Less poor ways. lol I once took a questionnaire to determine how in touch I was with my "inner child" as they used to call it. Turns out, I AM my inner child. We are one. I may be 42, but I continue to look at every day as a new adventure, and i don't care if i live to be 142 (or more) but I'll still enjoy having as much fun in every day as possible. Some days, that may not be a ton of fun (like when i actually have a job to go to), but there's always another day to have fun! Until there isn't, of course.
In preparation for that possibility, I've told my nephews to put on my tombstone as my famous last words: "Relax! I got this!" Always leave them laughing, I think Leslie Neilsen said. That's assuming I don't outlive my nephews. I've done so much stupid shit in my life that I think my nephews could laugh about it for a thousand years. And since I'm not dead yet, there's more coming! Oh, the hilarity!
As an aside, there was a House retrospective done by Hugh Laurie (who plays House) before the series finale. I knew he was english, but I was completely surprised by how his voice was accented when he wasn't playing House. He didn't sound anything like him. I'm not sure how that's possible, but I guess that's why it surprised me. The clipped english didn't even remotely remind me of House's speech patterns, which I guess means Hugh Laurie is a hell of an actor. Props, Hugh! Well done on the american accent.
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Doesn't Anyone Think Any More?
So I see this commercial on TV for "Air Delight."
It's a chocolate bar, apparently. I don't know who makes it, but in the commercial, there's like hundreds of people made of chocolate dancing around on a chocolate field like it's the second coming of jesus christ and everyone is in rapture. So then they finally show the candy bar. It's a chocolate bar with lots of air bubbles in it.
Doesn't anyone think about this? Instead of chocolate, you're getting AIR. Usually, you don't have to pay for air. But wrap some chocolate around it, and now you do. Brilliant way to charge you for nothing, isn't it? Think about it. Instead of a bar made up completely of chocolate, that delicious, wondrous thing made of cocoa beans, you're eating AIR. It's probably about half the chocolate you'd normally get, by my reckoning. So it's lighter, sure, because there's less chocolate. I mean, if you're watching your weight and you want to eat air, having half a chocolate bar and saving the rest for next time is probably better than buying an "air delight," and much more satisfying. Of course, i imagine they had to do it like that, and are probably not only charging you more for the air-filled candy bar, but you really think you're getting more out of it. Because if they just gave you half a chocolate bar for the same price instead of marketing it up as AIR, well, you might be upset. Then again, if you're dumb enough to pay for edible air in the first place, you probably wouldn't notice.
It reminds me of those funky yogurt things. I think they're called "whips." They're basically just yogurt as far as I can tell. You know what the difference is? it says in big text on the side of the container "for best results, do not stir." So. it's yogurt. That you don't stir. No, it's a WHIP! Which is pretty much what a yogurt is anyway. Only you stir it. My niece was thrilled with whips when they first came out. I bought one and tasted it. It was yogurt. I've had yogurt before, i know what it tastes like. I tried to tell her and she just didn't get it. I'm not really sure why. She has a job with a lawyer's office and seems like a reasonably intelligent individual. But just can't grasp the concept that someone might be lying to her to get her to pay more money for something that's exactly the same thing. And she works with lawyers?
So the season finale of Grimm was done much more nicely than the other season finales I watched. Yes, there was some pretty intense action and a lot of major changes to the characters, and yes, crazy shit happened in the last few minutes. But no major characters died, you were never left wondering what happened to them, the bad guys got it in the end, and everyone was safe. No worries! Bring on next season! See, now that's decent writing. If you come back because you like the show, that's the important part. Even if Grimm gets cancelled now, it's okay, because I know the characters on the show will be safe. And yes, i know they're just fictional characters, but that's not the point. Of COURSE they're fictional characters, but if you don't care about what happens to them, then why the hell did you watch the show in the first place? It's a writer's job to make the characters real enough for you to care about them, so me caring about the fictional characters is just normal. Also, I don't have to remember what happened last season by the next time season 2 gets here because it can pick right up where it left off without any major explanations!
I also saw X-Men: First Class last night. Now something occurs to me, as X-Men is now showing on another channel today. The first scene in BOTH movies is Erik Lensher (magneto) losing his parents to the nazi slaughtering of the jews during WW2. The year was listed as 1944, and Erik appears at least about ten years old here. Now here's something I don't get.
Mutants are described as "children of the Atom" and are a result of radiation, right? I mean that's pretty much the whole explanation of their existence. So. If radiation causes them to be born with superpowers due to a genetic mutation in their DNA from the radiation caused by atomic weapons detonations, then... how did little Erik Lensher get to be born with mutant genes at least TEN YEARS before the invention of atomic weapons? Even atomic weapons testing didn't begin until they'd actually almost perfected the thing, soooo... if the first one was actually detonated in 1945 and the tests were only done in maybe 1944 or so once they'd figured out how to do it (nowhere near europe, I might add), then how did the radiation go back in time to infect the conception of little Magneto? Oops! That would mean someone would have had to be playing around with atomic radiation around 1934, and frankly, I don't know of anyone who could possibly have been doing that. For most people, cars were still new back in 1934.
And if you're wondering if it's only magneto they made a mistake with... X-Men: First class clearly shows Professor Xavier having his mutant telepathy around the same time Erik gets his. And they also show Mystique around that same time. Flash forward to 1962 when "First class" takes place. There's mutants running around like mad. Sure, you can say "well the bombs went off in 1945 so that's plenty of time to have little mutant babies everywhere." Is it? Do the math. 1952 would be ten years previous. 1942 would be 20. So assuming 1944 would be the cutoff point for radiation exposure, and nothing before that would work (even if there was a tiny amount of background radiation around before then), and even if all the current crop of mutants were born in 1944, that would mean the absolute oldest mutant could be 18 years old. And yet there's dozens of them of various ages, including emma frost, who certainly doesn't LOOK 18 when she's prancing around as a mercenary prostitute, and the bad guy she works for is apparently very old, so old that he was old when he met Magneto when magneto was only ten.
So where the hell did they all come from? Yea, I don't know either. Oh well, mutants are still cool, just not enough thought given to the back story.
It's a chocolate bar, apparently. I don't know who makes it, but in the commercial, there's like hundreds of people made of chocolate dancing around on a chocolate field like it's the second coming of jesus christ and everyone is in rapture. So then they finally show the candy bar. It's a chocolate bar with lots of air bubbles in it.
Doesn't anyone think about this? Instead of chocolate, you're getting AIR. Usually, you don't have to pay for air. But wrap some chocolate around it, and now you do. Brilliant way to charge you for nothing, isn't it? Think about it. Instead of a bar made up completely of chocolate, that delicious, wondrous thing made of cocoa beans, you're eating AIR. It's probably about half the chocolate you'd normally get, by my reckoning. So it's lighter, sure, because there's less chocolate. I mean, if you're watching your weight and you want to eat air, having half a chocolate bar and saving the rest for next time is probably better than buying an "air delight," and much more satisfying. Of course, i imagine they had to do it like that, and are probably not only charging you more for the air-filled candy bar, but you really think you're getting more out of it. Because if they just gave you half a chocolate bar for the same price instead of marketing it up as AIR, well, you might be upset. Then again, if you're dumb enough to pay for edible air in the first place, you probably wouldn't notice.
It reminds me of those funky yogurt things. I think they're called "whips." They're basically just yogurt as far as I can tell. You know what the difference is? it says in big text on the side of the container "for best results, do not stir." So. it's yogurt. That you don't stir. No, it's a WHIP! Which is pretty much what a yogurt is anyway. Only you stir it. My niece was thrilled with whips when they first came out. I bought one and tasted it. It was yogurt. I've had yogurt before, i know what it tastes like. I tried to tell her and she just didn't get it. I'm not really sure why. She has a job with a lawyer's office and seems like a reasonably intelligent individual. But just can't grasp the concept that someone might be lying to her to get her to pay more money for something that's exactly the same thing. And she works with lawyers?
So the season finale of Grimm was done much more nicely than the other season finales I watched. Yes, there was some pretty intense action and a lot of major changes to the characters, and yes, crazy shit happened in the last few minutes. But no major characters died, you were never left wondering what happened to them, the bad guys got it in the end, and everyone was safe. No worries! Bring on next season! See, now that's decent writing. If you come back because you like the show, that's the important part. Even if Grimm gets cancelled now, it's okay, because I know the characters on the show will be safe. And yes, i know they're just fictional characters, but that's not the point. Of COURSE they're fictional characters, but if you don't care about what happens to them, then why the hell did you watch the show in the first place? It's a writer's job to make the characters real enough for you to care about them, so me caring about the fictional characters is just normal. Also, I don't have to remember what happened last season by the next time season 2 gets here because it can pick right up where it left off without any major explanations!
I also saw X-Men: First Class last night. Now something occurs to me, as X-Men is now showing on another channel today. The first scene in BOTH movies is Erik Lensher (magneto) losing his parents to the nazi slaughtering of the jews during WW2. The year was listed as 1944, and Erik appears at least about ten years old here. Now here's something I don't get.
Mutants are described as "children of the Atom" and are a result of radiation, right? I mean that's pretty much the whole explanation of their existence. So. If radiation causes them to be born with superpowers due to a genetic mutation in their DNA from the radiation caused by atomic weapons detonations, then... how did little Erik Lensher get to be born with mutant genes at least TEN YEARS before the invention of atomic weapons? Even atomic weapons testing didn't begin until they'd actually almost perfected the thing, soooo... if the first one was actually detonated in 1945 and the tests were only done in maybe 1944 or so once they'd figured out how to do it (nowhere near europe, I might add), then how did the radiation go back in time to infect the conception of little Magneto? Oops! That would mean someone would have had to be playing around with atomic radiation around 1934, and frankly, I don't know of anyone who could possibly have been doing that. For most people, cars were still new back in 1934.
And if you're wondering if it's only magneto they made a mistake with... X-Men: First class clearly shows Professor Xavier having his mutant telepathy around the same time Erik gets his. And they also show Mystique around that same time. Flash forward to 1962 when "First class" takes place. There's mutants running around like mad. Sure, you can say "well the bombs went off in 1945 so that's plenty of time to have little mutant babies everywhere." Is it? Do the math. 1952 would be ten years previous. 1942 would be 20. So assuming 1944 would be the cutoff point for radiation exposure, and nothing before that would work (even if there was a tiny amount of background radiation around before then), and even if all the current crop of mutants were born in 1944, that would mean the absolute oldest mutant could be 18 years old. And yet there's dozens of them of various ages, including emma frost, who certainly doesn't LOOK 18 when she's prancing around as a mercenary prostitute, and the bad guy she works for is apparently very old, so old that he was old when he met Magneto when magneto was only ten.
So where the hell did they all come from? Yea, I don't know either. Oh well, mutants are still cool, just not enough thought given to the back story.
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